Hi
My 90 year old mother went into a care home in September, just 10 mins drive away from me after living with me for the last 3 years.
After going there for respite twice, after a talk with her social worker, she decided she wanted to stay there for the rest of her days. She said she knew I was getting older and also having to foster my eldest granddaughter, she felt she should now, then, be with people nearer her own age. It upset me greatly but I sort of came to terms with mum moving into the care home, but she has not been too happy there, getting upset when other residents would call out and staff not attending quick enough and I have been frustrated in the staff not getting mum's swollen legs raised and other less urgent problems.
My mother had a stroke 7 years ago with speech difficulty in expressing herself, but with perseverance, staff and myself could work out more or less what she needed. Sometimes though, she would give up explaining, if she wasn't understood easily. She also suffers from Rheumatoid arthritis, Osteo arthritis, incontinence (bladder and bowel) and heart failure.
My mother has often spoken of wanting to die and saying 'this is it now' whenever she has had any infection, in the last year.
Last week my mother developed 'Bronchitis' , this was diagnosed by the surgery's nurse practitioner, who prescribed antibiotics and steroids. The antibiotics got extended a few more days longer.
Mum has stated on many a time last week, that she didn't expect to be alive the next day and it was time now to go.
Mum was confused on many days last week, which was not a surprise, due to her having an infection, she refused all meals but on and off has had fluids but not nearly enough and it is very apparent that she has lost weight and is dehydrated.
The Care home manager has already said to me earlier this week that unless mum improves her fluid intake, she will need a nursing assessment and may need to move to a nursing home as only they can put up Intravenous fluids.
I understand this, but she might refuse having a drip up, and also she might refuse to being moved.
Since Monday, Mum has not really communicated much, just said yes or no to fluids and then sleeps the rest of the time.
I would welcome any opinions especially as I don't know of any recommended nursing homes near where I live, including having looked up the CSSIW (in North Wales) reports but I don't want to slow down any nursing care input for my mum.
Any advice would be very welcome
Christina
My 90 year old mother went into a care home in September, just 10 mins drive away from me after living with me for the last 3 years.
After going there for respite twice, after a talk with her social worker, she decided she wanted to stay there for the rest of her days. She said she knew I was getting older and also having to foster my eldest granddaughter, she felt she should now, then, be with people nearer her own age. It upset me greatly but I sort of came to terms with mum moving into the care home, but she has not been too happy there, getting upset when other residents would call out and staff not attending quick enough and I have been frustrated in the staff not getting mum's swollen legs raised and other less urgent problems.
My mother had a stroke 7 years ago with speech difficulty in expressing herself, but with perseverance, staff and myself could work out more or less what she needed. Sometimes though, she would give up explaining, if she wasn't understood easily. She also suffers from Rheumatoid arthritis, Osteo arthritis, incontinence (bladder and bowel) and heart failure.
My mother has often spoken of wanting to die and saying 'this is it now' whenever she has had any infection, in the last year.
Last week my mother developed 'Bronchitis' , this was diagnosed by the surgery's nurse practitioner, who prescribed antibiotics and steroids. The antibiotics got extended a few more days longer.
Mum has stated on many a time last week, that she didn't expect to be alive the next day and it was time now to go.
Mum was confused on many days last week, which was not a surprise, due to her having an infection, she refused all meals but on and off has had fluids but not nearly enough and it is very apparent that she has lost weight and is dehydrated.
The Care home manager has already said to me earlier this week that unless mum improves her fluid intake, she will need a nursing assessment and may need to move to a nursing home as only they can put up Intravenous fluids.
I understand this, but she might refuse having a drip up, and also she might refuse to being moved.
Since Monday, Mum has not really communicated much, just said yes or no to fluids and then sleeps the rest of the time.
I would welcome any opinions especially as I don't know of any recommended nursing homes near where I live, including having looked up the CSSIW (in North Wales) reports but I don't want to slow down any nursing care input for my mum.
Any advice would be very welcome
Christina