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Carers UK Forum • My mum who I care for
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My mum who I care for

Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2022 11:08 am
by Dealaney_2203
My mum is wheelchair bound has agrophobia and is alcohol dependent. I have been caring for her since we moved in together six years ago. She said originally she would adapt the house to her needs and try to reduce her alcohol. This has still not been achieved and she is reluctant to let me make any changes for her in the home. Recently I have struggled as she is not allowing me to do daily jobs I need to do for her welfare. ( Changing bedding, hoovering, dusting ect) and I have been concerned about this. She is extremely reluctant to accept any outside support and I am her only family. Do any other carers have any tips for me on how to work around these issues and try to get mum to accept the cleaning and positive changes for her access around the house? She's getting upset/defensive whenever I even mention it and I need some advice please? If she is preferring the messy room and unclean bedding and it's distressing her for me to clean how can I help her with this as I am worried her hygeine is deteriorating. Thanks.

Re: My mum who I care for

Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2022 12:41 pm
by bowlingbun
Welcome to the forum.
Who owns or rents the current home?
She is probably incapable of change, the alcohol is more important?
What do you want to happen. Ultimately, you can't change her, but you can change your own circumstances.
No one can be forced to care.