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Stubborn 98 year old father in law.

Posted: Thu Apr 18, 2019 5:18 pm
by christina 17
Stubborn 98 year old father in law.

My father in law is 98, had a stroke about 3 years ago and then started having carers 4 times a day.
His son, (my husband) and I live 200 hundred miles away and he has no other close relatives.
He lives in a bungalow and the carers get him up in the morning, help with dressing, tablets and breakfast. Then visit and do his lunch, assist to bathroom, and the same at teatime and bedtime and help him undress and help him into bed.
My husband visits him once a fornight for 2 or more night and I go up with him on occasions to stay. In between my husband brings him down to our house for holiday times, if he wants to come.

His mobility had been quite good until the last 2 months. He walks with a zimmer frame but recently his knees have given way and he is prone to falls. He has a careline. He doesn't have any dementia.
He has had 2 hospital admissions in the last 6 weeks (he stayed in for 2 weeks first time then for one week, the second time and each time no serious injuries, just a bit of bruising and shaken up) and has fallen about 6 times since discharge and either the neighbour comes in to see to him via contact from careline or the carers come in and have found him on the floor. They either try and get him up with another pair of hands or phone the paramedics and after assessment have not needed to take him into hospital recently.
The carers have asked father in law where he wants to sit, as he sometimes likes to do his art on the dining room table, then they will take him there and take him back to recliner chair at the end of the hour. They and the hospital have asked if not to walk by himself with no carers but he refuses to take any notice, he chooses when he wants to walk and has had frequent falls as a result.
Although he agrees not to walk without someone with him, it doesn't stop him getting up (with a struggle and very unsteady at first) and walking where he wants to. Any suggestions to reduce his falls? He also has a motorised scooter which he can operate but doesn't always choose to use it, even though he agrees to.
Any advice greatfully received.

Re: Stubborn 98 year old father in law.

Posted: Thu Apr 18, 2019 9:58 pm
by Rhona
Hi Christina
Last year my dad had a lot of trouble getting up from the armchair and also had falls. The reason why elderly people have difficulty getting up from sitting is because they lose muscle mass as they age. Dad had a physiotherapist come round each week to teach him simple exercises to help overcome the problems. Encourage Father in law to lift his feet up and do marching while he is still sitting in his chair. Do this for about 20 seconds if possible. Another exercise is to lift one leg at a time and hold for 5 seconds while sitting in the chair. These exercises will get his blood circulating which will make it easier when he rises from the chair. So get him to do the chair exercises JUST BEFORE getting up from the chair.
Check your father in laws blood pressure because if it gets very high that can cause falls. Also encourage him to have a blood test to ensure he is not low in any vitamins especially the B vitamins. Hope this helps.

Re: Stubborn 98 year old father in law.

Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2019 7:52 am
by bowlingbun
All that travelling isn't good for any of you. Does FIL own, or rent, his home?

Re: Stubborn 98 year old father in law.

Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2019 9:35 am
by MrsAverage
Hi Christina
Neither you nor Dad will want to hear this but it does sound as though his needs have increased to the stage where he needs residential care. It won't stop him falling totally but would mean he was found and helped quickly.
As things are now his next fall and hospitalization would probably mean he would be discharged to a Home anyway.
Better than being dealt with as emergency in which you'd get no choice is to research homes now. Whether that's in his area or yours is worth thinking about.


Kr
MrsA