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introducing myself - Carers UK Forum

introducing myself

Tell us a bit about yourself here.
hi I am Sally though I prefer to be called SJ


My Dad has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's dementia about a month ago. Though the symptoms have been getting bad for nearly a year. I live and work in London and he is on the south coast so have made an arrangment to work once a month from home to be with him.
I am finding it hard , to think about the future and loss of who he was. He was an academic and his intelligence was everything. I feel very alone at times and guilty that I cant be there all the time but equally find it all overwhelming when I am there.

Anyway today I am OK and so thought I would introduce myself when not in crisis mode.

SJ
Sally_22081 wrote:
Tue Aug 16, 2022 5:45 pm
hi I am Sally though I prefer to be called SJ


My Dad has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's dementia about a month ago. Though the symptoms have been getting bad for nearly a year. I live and work in London and he is on the south coast so have made an arrangment to work once a month from home to be with him.
I am finding it hard , to think about the future and loss of who he was. He was an academic and his intelligence was everything. I feel very alone at times and guilty that I cant be there all the time but equally find it all overwhelming when I am there.

Anyway today I am OK and so thought I would introduce myself when not in crisis mode.

SJ
Hi SJ

Sorry to hear about your Dad’s diagnosis.
That is a cruel illness and must be very difficult for everyone involved.
You will have good and bad days, make the most of the good ones.
Post when you feel able, there are some very kind and knowledgeable carers here.
All the emotions you have are normal and it’s ok to feel them.

Keep in touch with us

John
Hello SJ

So sorry to hear about your dad, it will be such a worry and it is terrible.
All your emotions, thoughts and feelings are valid and a natural human response and you will go through more.
You are fortunate that your employers are accommodating.

Keep checking in for replies from those with more knowledge.
There is also a forum for alzheimers/dementia which you will find invaluable as well as here.
Don't be alone, use both.

Have you got power of attorney? if not can you do it with his GP or solicitor if it is not too late?

You have a lot ahead of you, the emotional turmoil, the role reversal and the cruel disease happening not just to your dad but to all of you. .

If your dad hasn't had a care needs assessment you need to arrange that through soc svcs
Hi tell us more
Hi SJ, welcome to the forum.

If at all possible, arrange Power of Attorney asap.
Dad is now entitled to Attendance Allowance and then he will be exempt from Council Tax. That's a lot of money saved!

How old is dad?
Is his house disabled friendly?
Does he own or rent his home?
Are you a single child?
Does he have over £23,000 in savings.

The answers to these questions will help work out what would be best for both of you, in the longer term.

What is he struggling with most, at the moment?