Sorry I'm new to the forum but I need to vent

[Adrian lock]

Hi I am a Carer for my wife who has eds and m.e and is bed bound as well as my wife I look after our 6 children one of which has ADHD and self harms and has recently started starving herself and making herself sick after she was told she was fat. I'm sorry to moan on my first post but I feel like I'm going to explode if I don't vent soon, I am lucky that I have a Carer come in twice a day to help look after my wife with washing and meds but I feel like I never stop I'm up 4/5 times a night with my wife and up early for school runs and to sort my wife out and up til late with my daughter who only needs a few hours sleep at night so come this time of night 00.00 I am worn out but still going 100 miles an hour and never know weather to grab some sleep while I can or stay up so I can have some me time.
I don't like moaning to people around me as it's my wife who has to live with this illness not me and always feel guilty when I do complain does anyone else feel like is and am I wrong to moan, I love my family with all my heart but I am so so tired

[Sprinter]

Hi Adrain, and welcome to the forum.

I'm sorry to moan on my first post but I feel like I'm going to explode if I don't vent soon

That's the reason the forum is here. Use it as your wailing wall, there is always someone to listen and offer understanding.

I don't like moaning to people around me as it's my wife who has to live with this illness not me and always feel guilty when I do complain does anyone else feel like is

I realised some time ago that even though only one has the disability, two are suffering from it. It isn't wrong to complain, because someone has to care for the carer.

[Brindleboy123]

Morning Adrian and a warm welcome to the forum! You certainly have your hands full and it's no wonder you want to vent your feelings. Please feel free to do that here...I have no doubt that we have all felt the same at some point. Caring isn't easy and there are times when we just need to have a rest to recharge our batteries or we can end up being no use to anyone. Have you had a carers assessment recently? Just a thought.

Anyway, join in on the forum whenever or wherever you feel like it.

Bell x

[rea]

You are no different to everyother carer on here we all have to vent off our steam somewhere and where better than here where everyone at some point feels the same and understands
Take care

[Pete the Paint]

Hi Adrian, blimey mate you really do have something to moan about!!
Thats what were all here for to vent our frustration/feelings as we all totally understand what its like for you and each other.
Also many of us have experianced the same problems and can offer advise or help in some small way.
I know I have learned a lot on here from the others.

Our daughter-in-Law had ME and is now very nearly over it. It did last for a few years and she was very poorly and wheelchair bound for quite some time.
She managed to overcome it herself and with the help of a GP who believed her when she said she had it.

As for your daughter and self harming I'm afraid I have no experiance of this thank god. I really hope you get some real help with that asap.

Join in roll call with us if you want to. Its just to let each other know were ok thats all.

Look after yourself mate, your pretty fantastic you know.

Pete.

[bowlingbun]

Welcome to the forum. Stop trying to be Superman, contact Social Services, ask for a new needs assessment for your wife and daughter, most importantly, ask for someone to do an URGENT Carers Assessment, not at home, but somewhere you can tell them how it really is. There are too many of us here, me includec, who are paying a high price for ignoring our own health needs for too long. HAve you told your GP how you feel?

[Myrtle]

Hi Adrian and welcome, sounds like you are doing an amazing job, well done. And don't ever apologise for moaning, we all do that!
Sprinter is spot on as disability never just affects the caree, but the carer too.

[Melly1]

Hi Adrian and welcome,

feel to vent, this is the one place you can and you wont be judged. Caring is hard and it sounds like you have a mammoth job caring for everyone in your house. Is your daughter receiving support for her self harming and bulimia?

Melly1