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Someone point me in the right direction - Carers UK Forum

Someone point me in the right direction

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Hi I am a carer for mum dont know who to get assistance and advice from mum suffers from mental health problems following a hospital admission in March she had a relapse with her mental health in April had spent some time being assessed in a mental health unit with medication changes due to ill health admitted to another hospital as mental health unit could not give her medical treatment due to the hospital admission lost her bed admitted to another ward whilst they assessed her care home needs. During this time her treatment of me has been very distressing no answers given regarding mental health, now in a care home and refusing to speak to me care staff very tactless with remarks like I wonder why she is like that with you ?? as if i dont feel bad enough with the breakdown in our relationship and hello her mental assessment has never been completed or questions answered what is the way forward I am her next of kin
blimey i have no idea- but some one with more advice rather than a dropped jaw responce will be able to help, u r in the right place.
how awful for your relationship to break down like this, are their no case workers for your mum who can help? the assesment needs chasing up ASAP, she needs it and so do u. Its possible if your mum has a mental heealth issue she is associating u with that as u r always there for her, and that needs sorting out, she needs to realsie who u r, and how much u love her. sounds like the care home are not helping much at all
good luck with everything and big hugs x
hi there. what is happening is normal and the way you are feeling is normal too, the way the staff are with you is bad as there dont really know you. get help and advice from a charity like mind as there understand what it is really like for you and the person with the illness. your not alone. check the mental health forum too
I have rang the mental health team to day to check if mum had a community nurse to review her mental health and to advise me thank god I did I was informed that as she was in a care home she didnt have any visits planned?????? The consultant has now agreed to go out and review her. Could this explain why mums mental health does not seem to be improving at all. This worries me to think how many people with mental health problems there needs are not being met at all and if you have no relatives to fight your corner what chance to you have, I will also be contacting Mind as suggested any glimmer of hope is good
it is very sad that people just dont look at mental health as a disability and on how it affects them and those that care about them. i know it took me 3yrs to get a cpn and a proper care plan for my partner. you have to fight all the time to get things sorted out. but your not alone. glad you have contacted mind, hopefully there will have a group near you for extra support. always remember your not alone. you have joined a group of great people who will help you along the way. and dont be afraid to ask questions on anything your not sure on..
Hello there - another charity which gives good support is Rethink. I don't know what part of the country you are in, but they do have contacts nationwide......Here is their link -
www.rethink.org

or a specific page for contact is
http://www.rethink.org/contact_us.html

I hope that you're coping better and have found some help x
Thank you for all the links and information that I am receiving I am so grateful. Feel really down regarding mums situation. Just been to see her she still wont talk to me it is so heartbreaking I knew we would have a blip when she went in the nursing home but thought it would be starting to resolve now. As mum has property she will have to pay for her care I dont want social workers dealing with the financial side such as the bank someone please tell me they cant do that, dont mind assistance with any claim she needs to make but her bank information is her business, I feel that the way she is at the mo she will let anyone do anything but me. Can I not complete the finance form say invoice me for the fees and take it from there. She has still not had a mental health assessment yet as the consultant discussed just feel that the barrier between us getting higher and higher words cannot describe how soul destroying all this is. What is the way forward ??? Why do things always happen at the weekend when you cant ring anyone to disccus?
As mum has property she will have to pay for her care I dont want social workers dealing with the financial side such as the bank someone please tell me they cant do that, dont mind assistance with any claim she needs to make but her bank information is her business, I feel that the way she is at the mo she will let anyone do anything but me.
This is tricky and painful - and someone else here please correct me if I'm wrong.
Unless you have a power of attorney signed by her, or are granted some form of guardianship by a Court, you may not have the right to manage her financial affairs.

Sorry, I know thats not what you want to hear Image
Hi some answers we get are not always what we want to hear but this is just a minefield so any direction people can point me in is a very big help to me. I just dont seem to be receiving any advice or help from social worker or anyone. As she has paranoia at the moment towards me didnt want to go down that route till we were back on track but worried that day may never come.
I'm sorry that you're having such a rough time. It's always bad when our parents have to go into a nursing home or such. Unfortunately, I believe, that it's natural for your Mum to 'blame' you - although we all know that you are simply trying your best to care for your Mum.
Have you tried Rethink yet? Usually in the mental health system, they have an advocate to help people like yourself and your Mum. Image As I say, Rethink organisation does that in this part of the Country (Peterborough)...
I'm not sure if your Mum has an ongoing Mental Health disorder, or whether it's just come on as she has got older?
I'm really not sure about the financial side - it's so different if your Mum owns her own place. As my Mum was in rented accomodation, the Home she was in only had control over the money that we put into her account there. ...ie: for hairdressers, etc. ..and she had already agreed to us sorting out the financial affairs, even though we hadn't got LPA (or whatever it is these days)....
I can understand how mixed up you must be with it all - just keep calling in - so that YOU can feel supported xx