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Carers UK Forum • Please pleas help, I am at the end of my tether. - Page 2
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oh jane, i do not

Posted: Tue Aug 14, 2007 5:39 pm
by pamr
oh jane, i do not think you should be ashamed, i think in fact that you should be very proud of yourself for telling us your story. i was very moved when i read it, in fact i was overwhelmed with admiration for you.

we all come on here with our stories to tell, and in fact support one another, so as there is no doubt that you are a carer, we welcome you with open arms.

as she always does, rosemary has some very good advice for you. i am not so good at that, but just wanted you to know that i care and we are all here for you. look forward to hearing from you very soon.

pam xx

Jane said... I feel desperately guilty

Posted: Tue Aug 14, 2007 6:15 pm
by rosemary
Jane said...
I feel desperately guilty for posting any of this, or even coming to this site. Really ashamed that I did this
If I could physically hug you Jane I would.Please dont feel this way.You have taken a massive step forward in sharing this with us and know that your feelings are shared by many.We are all here mostly to get/give support Jane, but ultimately it is your decision whether you stay or not.

1. Carry on coping as you are with hubby for support
or
2. Carry on coping as you are with hubby for support but now also new friends you have met online who can help support you too.

I know which one I would chose but this is about you and whats best for you.

This next link,take your time reading it,see what each person has added.You will see that they can relate to some of the emotions you have.

http://www.carersuk.org/Forums/archive/ ... 63537.html


Pam said
oh jane, i do not think you should be ashamed, i think in fact that you should be very proud of yourself for telling us your story. i was very moved when i read it, in fact i was overwhelmed with admiration for you.
Joining this forum Jane means you are now among people who recognise who you are and what you do.Each families circumstances are different but we share a common bond...to be there for one another whenever possible.We dont profess to know the answers,but we can support you through this.Like Pam said,Be proud of yourself.

I truly hope you will remain with us.

Walk tall
Rosemary
x x x x x

You are so lovely. Thank

Posted: Tue Aug 14, 2007 6:32 pm
by Jane
You are so lovely. Thank you. I'm overwhelmed by your kindness. I was so afraid I would be judged, instead you've been so kind to me.

I wish I had found this place years ago. I have looked at that link and can identify with alot of the words - confusion is something I feel, and I know why now...

Alot of people have said both positive words and negative words - that's like the paradox I feel.

Yes, that link was helpful. Thank you.

Dear Jane One thing for sure

Posted: Tue Aug 14, 2007 6:51 pm
by Maryann
Dear Jane

One thing for sure you'll never be judged here. As others have said your story was very moving, but I too have nothing but admiration for you as with all your struggles you have managed to overcome many of it by having a good job and a supportive husband. Shows how strong a person you are.

Glad that you have found the forum and do hope that you will continue to post as I'm sure that you will be be able to help others through your own experiences aswell as feeling supported yourself.

Take care
Maryann x

Hi Jane Welcome to the forum,

Posted: Tue Aug 14, 2007 7:20 pm
by Guest
Hi Jane

Welcome to the forum, I see you've already had some excellent advice from other members.

Please never feel ashamed to share your fears and worries on here, we're all here to support each other and offer advice and a shoulder to cry on - we also manage to have the odd laugh, something we all need from time to time!

Look forward to chatting with you soon.

Take care

Paula xx

Hi Jane like you I have

Posted: Tue Aug 14, 2007 8:18 pm
by SallyK
Hi Jane

like you I have come to this site for help, advice and support. I cannot offer you anything more than a verbal hug, but wish you all the very best and hope that you find the help that you need to carry on.

As Rosemary said, Walk Tall but know that you can learn to lean with the help of these wonderful people

best wishes, Sal x

verbal hugs are very theraputic

Posted: Tue Aug 14, 2007 10:19 pm
by Jane
verbal hugs are very theraputic

I hope any regrets you

Posted: Tue Aug 14, 2007 10:26 pm
by rosemary
I hope any regrets you had about joining us have now disappeared Jane.

Kettle on...anyone for a cuppa....???? Image

Hello Jane and welcome to

Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 6:48 am
by charles47
Hello Jane and welcome to the forum. But I do have one comment to make:
Dear Jane

One thing for sure you'll never be judged here.
I don't agree with Maryann on this one. I think we have all judged you to be a loving daughter who has had a great deal to cope with throughout your life. I have nothing but admiration for your courage.

And your comments about your mum do sound remarkably like Asperger Syndrome.

Other than that, I'd say that Rosemary's advice is the best to follow. And perhaps you might consider changing your landline number - and putting your mobile on silent at night!

Best wishes,

Charles

Hi Jane, You are among

Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 8:43 am
by Myrtle
Hi Jane,
You are among friends. please don't feel guilty or ashamed. What you have carried alone for so long shows what a strong and lovely person you are.
It does sound as though your mum has Aspergers and that can be extremely difficult to cope with.
Can't add any more to the links you have already been given, but do look for help face to face as those in your area will know exactly what is available for you.
You are truly an amazing person Image