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Carer for my husband and daughter - Carers UK Forum

Carer for my husband and daughter

Tell us a bit about yourself here.
Hi I’m new on here,Just wanted a chat.
Iam a carer for my husband he had a stroke nov last year,Iam finding it so hard as he seems so angry all the time with no tolerance what so ever which makes me sad as he had always been great with our 26yr old daughter of which I also care for as she is disabled.she has tuberous sclerosis and behavioural difficulties.My son is 18 and is studying his a-levels so he stays in his room out of the way. I Just feel like curling up in a ball and hope things all go away.But it won’t, my husband is 45yrs old.
Please tell me things will get better :cry: xxx
Hi Lindsay, welcome to the forum.

You have a lot of caring responsibilities, I imagine you feel constantly tugged in all directions, with no time to be "me".
When did Social Services last update your Carer's Assessment?
Have they done a Needs Assessment for your husband?

I had to look up your daughter's condition. How does it affect her daily life?
What support does she get from Social Services?
My husband can be very stubborn he says there nothing wrong,so will not except his anger.I have sorted a lot out Regards pip etc.Jess has help from direct payments she goes to a day center 3 times a week. She had seizures at 6 weeks till she was 4yrs when the treatment she received was substandard Leaving her with behavioural difficulties learning difficulties to cut long story short she’s stayed at the age of 4.
Hi Lindsay,
My son was brain damaged at birth. He's now 40, fit and well, but can't read, write or do any maths. He lives in his own flat with carer support. I have health problems myself and can't care for him full time. Good to hear that your daughter has a good package of care.

If your husband denies that he gets angry, could you use your mobile phone to film or record him, to show him later? Or show his doctors? Other carers have found that this is the easiest way of being believed by the medical profession.

Have you had a Carers Assessment? Even if your husband won't accept he has problems, you can still have a Carers Assessment for him, and of course your daughter too.
Yes that sounds like a plan x Thanks