Hi everyone
I am new to this site. I have cared for my wife for 8 years now and have worked full time in some ways I was fortunate enough to be in a caring role more supervisory so my caring impacted on me more in out of work time and mainly was running home and making sure my wife had all she needed but could still have time for a normal life . About 2 months ago as many see my wife had started a decline and as so gradual I was not noticing it maybe in some ways also ignoring some of the signs .We had no care help in all that time and on the frequent visits to Doctors they were all assuring me things were ok .About a month ago she started to have falls and seemed in more pain than normal which ended in a hospital stay which was a wake up call to me my wife had stroke 8 years ago which left no mobility etc. problems but turned a once full on strong personality into a meek person and I listened to what she was telling me instead of investigation it turns out she was dehydrated and had tried to limit pain in movement by cutting down on food and liquid intake .To cut to the chase I realised I was not managing her care at all through ignorance and not through any kind of malicious intent with the hospital and social service input I quickly saw the system would not be able to give the care she needed and knew I had a hard decision to make which is to give up work and become her full time carer . She was discharged yesterday and I have been arranging and getting Benefit advice on how to replace my income to fulfil this role .
Already I have found how difficult it is to get to the right benefit as we are not a normal couple she is 73 and I am 58 and all the primary benefits we do not fit It seems that our only way forward is pension credit for the wife and only carer credit for me What a daunting prospect and can only progress the claim if I give up work straight away .
Seeing as the fact will be that for the next few weeks we are going to financially struggle and come to terms with my new role. My aims are not to let the caring suffer and try and not to dwell on the next few weeks of hardship and fighting to survive so thought would post this to know that others have been through this and could give me encouragement as the times get tough
I am new to this site. I have cared for my wife for 8 years now and have worked full time in some ways I was fortunate enough to be in a caring role more supervisory so my caring impacted on me more in out of work time and mainly was running home and making sure my wife had all she needed but could still have time for a normal life . About 2 months ago as many see my wife had started a decline and as so gradual I was not noticing it maybe in some ways also ignoring some of the signs .We had no care help in all that time and on the frequent visits to Doctors they were all assuring me things were ok .About a month ago she started to have falls and seemed in more pain than normal which ended in a hospital stay which was a wake up call to me my wife had stroke 8 years ago which left no mobility etc. problems but turned a once full on strong personality into a meek person and I listened to what she was telling me instead of investigation it turns out she was dehydrated and had tried to limit pain in movement by cutting down on food and liquid intake .To cut to the chase I realised I was not managing her care at all through ignorance and not through any kind of malicious intent with the hospital and social service input I quickly saw the system would not be able to give the care she needed and knew I had a hard decision to make which is to give up work and become her full time carer . She was discharged yesterday and I have been arranging and getting Benefit advice on how to replace my income to fulfil this role .
Already I have found how difficult it is to get to the right benefit as we are not a normal couple she is 73 and I am 58 and all the primary benefits we do not fit It seems that our only way forward is pension credit for the wife and only carer credit for me What a daunting prospect and can only progress the claim if I give up work straight away .
Seeing as the fact will be that for the next few weeks we are going to financially struggle and come to terms with my new role. My aims are not to let the caring suffer and try and not to dwell on the next few weeks of hardship and fighting to survive so thought would post this to know that others have been through this and could give me encouragement as the times get tough