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New to the forum - Carers UK Forum

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I have been caring for my 87 year old mother for almost six years now, without any help. She is now in the late stages of dementia and has just spent 11 weeks in a later life mental health facility after being sectioned under the Mental Health Act last November. I pushed for her to be discharged home to my care again, but unfortunately, she has lost a lot of her mobility and can no longer go downstairs. As a result she is now bedridden because the local authority have refused to supply a stair lift. We have carers in three times a day for personal care, washing, changing pads etc, however, I am beginning to regret my decision to bring her home as the local authority have told me I can only have a sitting service for two hours per week to do the weekly shop. I asked if I could have an extra two hours per week for other appointments such as dentist, hairdressers, doctors etc, but this has been refused. As my only income is my carers allowance and a small amount of income support, I cannot afford to pay for a private sitter @£17.95 per hour. My only relative is my brother who lives 20 miles away and I have no good neighbours or friends to call on. I am now imprisoned in the house seven days a week, except for my weekly visit to the supermarket (woohoo!). Has anyone else had this experience? I am wondering if this is illegal and an infringement of civil liberties. I have calculated that over six years I have saved the taxpayer around £600,000 pounds in care fees, yet they won't pay out an extra £36 a week to give me a bit of fresh air and freedom.
How much is mother paying you for her care?! Is she claiming Attendance Allowance? If her income is just benefits, and she was in residential care all her benefits ould go towards her care apart from about £25. Has she had a Needs Assessment from Social Services? Have you had a Carers Assessment? There are special rules for people who have beee detained in hospital ubder a section. Do you want her in residential care, or more care at home?
What's happening to your mum's Old Age State Pension? Why is this not coming to you?

As for saving the state money, well, yes, this is the bitter irony of it all, isn't it? That family carers do 'for free' what the state would have to pay a care home to do for a hundred pounds a day (what my MIL pays for self-funded residential care!)
My only relative is my brother who lives 20 miles away
That doesnt sound far at all. Surely he could do more on a planned basis, perhaps weekends to give you a break? If he's expecting to have half any inheritance, he should be shouldering half the burden . Even if there is no inheritance, he should be doing his share.
After so many years of caring it's ESSENTIAL that whatever your mum leaves in her estate when she dies comes to YOU, not your brother (if he's done sod all about looking after her!). My MIL pays a hundred pounds a DAY for her residential care for dementia - that's £36000 a YEAR....so for six years of you caring, that makes, I think well over £200,000 in your equivalent care - ie, that is what is due to YOU, in 'payment' for what you've done for your mum. Your brother can only split whatever sum is OVER that amount in your mum's estate.

Why is he not helping?