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New to group help with ppms - Page 2 - Carers UK Forum

New to group help with ppms

Tell us a bit about yourself here.
Thanks will look into this. Got mobile pip thanks 😃
Great, I once met a friend with less than 2 months before she was 65. I told her to go home asap and apply. I was granted, and ever since, she's had a Motability car named after me. Another friend has also done the same!
Hi Maureen
I am interested in your comment that he resents you going out to see friends. My initial reaction was "ok, he resents it but so what?!!" but then I wondered why he resents it? Is he lonely or bored when you go out, or does he perhaps feel unsafe? If its any of these then there can be solutions, but if it's just his nature to be self centred or controlling then "So what?" should be your internal response.
I'm not expecting you to answer here, just giving you food for thought. So many carers on here seem to lose their sense of self worth, and I struggle to understand why sometimes
Remember, sad though it is, it's not your fault you are healthy and he is not.

After my husband was diagnosed some years ago with terminal cancer, he always wanted me to go out with my friends, so I had 'something cheerful' in the evneings sometimes. I did from time to time, but the point is, my husband, even though he was dying, thought of my happiness.

Quite frankly, your husband should have the same attitude. (!)

That said, as Mrs A says, if it's that he's scared of being on his own, that's slightly different.

You know you can book care-workers and 'sitters' to come in and both 'baby-sit' him, and keep him company, so you know he's safe when you go out.
Hi loving all your advice it has made me feel so much better. Thanks. Hope you all have a nice weekend. Mx
Do you think he is afraid of needing you when you are out? If so, the LA can arrange for him to have a Lifeline pendant linked to a phone, so he can call for help if you are not there.
Hi Maureen. I'm very new here, but not to caring. All I can offer is hugs. :kiss:
Hi Maureen
Really sympathise with you - it is a tough call . I look after my daughter who has RRMS and I am torn between guilt and caring for myself . We all need a break to recharge our batteries. It can be something small like meeting a friend for coffee or even a once a week class. - yoga, painting , learning a language. Just something to look forward to each week.

I was told by a counsellor that people with chronic conditions do tend to become very self focussed so even though your husband probably wants you to enjoy yourself maybe there is an underlying feeling of anger and frustration due to his condition.

Anyhow, hard as though it is try not to feel guilty!!!