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New to dementia journey - Page 60 - Carers UK Forum

New to dementia journey

Tell us a bit about yourself here.
941 posts
My 5 year old grandson sometimes calls me by my Christian name, which is fine by me. A friend's mum was always referred to as "Nanny Old Goat"! I don't like the term Granny, but chose Nanny instead, but why call someone after a goat?
My younger sister visited today. We've decided to go the older sisters grave after the funeral. On the day when the mourners have gone. It may seem an odd decision. However we feel it's the only /best option.
Hubby would support me on my decision I know, and little sisters husband is taking us. Im missing hubby so much. It's times like this that hit hard.
Hubby isn't eating much. I've asked the staff to swap the lunch/ dinner time food round. Thought he may prefer a lighter lunch and main meal at 5. Didn't seem to work today but we will see. Not interested in the pudding very much either. Another part of the illhess. He's enjoying breakfast from what I gather.
The homes do seem to like doing 'big lunch/little tea' don't they?! I suppose it's because it's easier for the catering staff, to have only a 'little meal' to clear up at the end of the day.

My digestive system is the opposite - I do light lunch and big dinner, so would hate the reverse regime.

Sorry to hear your husband is off his puds as well.....usually 'sweet carbs' is what they want most. Glad he's eating breakfast - I suppose he's hungry by then with low blood sugar overnight?

I do hope the hope is set up to make 'impromptu snacks'. My MIL can have buttered toast late at night from the ward level 'mini kitchen', which I think is an excellent idea.

Sadly, of course, not only are their appetites low as they become less active, but dementia takes the ability to recognise hunger cues.

I've noticed on my last two visits to my MIL that she could only manage half a jam and cream scone these days - usually she could polish off one and sometimes two!
Hi Pet
I got a bit frustrated not knowing what Dad was and wasn't eating, it is hard to keep track when you are not providing the meals yourself so I used to arrange my visits over meal times so I could guage how much he was eating.
I know the home did refer him to the specialist diet team , althought I pointed out to them he had already had the t shirt and been discharged by them when he was at home due to refusal of everything they offered.
You probably already have done so but perhaps some special supplements like Fortisip , Fortijuice and such like--- sorry if you've already tried all that and I missed it.
Hi Henrietta
It hasn't been long that hubby has had the change in appetite. I'm with him at lunchtime. I read his files lots and the appetite is definitely not as it was.Im going to get some complain or suchlike. I will get fortisips too. Poor hubby is so uncomfortable with the pressure sore too. The skin specialist ( can't think of the proper title) is going to see him on Friday. I'm hoping if they can get that sorted he will feel more like eating?
Thank you. How are you?
Tissue viability nurse?
Yes BB,that's the title. Thank you.
Hi Pet
Yes I 'm sure pain could put anyone off their food although sadly it may just be another part of the dementia, you just have to try and rule everything else out so you know you have tried everything possible.
I'm ok thanks, keeping busy with work and sorting things out. I suppose it is quite different losing a close loved partner to an elderly parent who's had "a good innings" . It must be so much harder for you.
Tissue viability nurse has been to hubby. He has to have a special breathable plaster. Bed rest for a while. His specialised chair I paid over £2000 for, has gone flat. well the seat has. I'm not happy about this, as poor hubby hasn't put weight on, he's lost it. These chairs are meant to last. So something else to get sorted.
I'm feeling really sad, the deterioration in hubby is showing now, and in bed he looks frail. I'm still visiting every other day, simply because it's the way I cope but the guilt monster is looming.
Tomorrow is our wedding anniversary which Im going to ignore.
So emotionally, not very good the last few days. Probably not going to be for the next few either. My sister's funeral on Wednesday.
941 posts