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New Member - Carers UK Forum

New Member

Tell us a bit about yourself here.
I right New Member and just think of Little Britain and Fat Fighters but I digress. I'm hesitant to say I'm a carer but my wife suffers from bi-polar and we've had some ups and down over the last 13 or so years. Currently we are a little bit up, she's coping with life, so that's good. Looking around I know there are people here who are much worse off but I've just got this frustration of people note quite understanding how it feels to be on egg-shells all the time. Perhaps that's just me. So looking to see if it's just me, or if its the same for others.

Sorry that was a bit rambly wasn't it?
Hi Chubby and Welcome ;)
I'm kind of new here myself and haven't been on for a while.
I'm a carer for my Daughter with many complex difficulties and I have no experience of Bi Polar so can't really give much feedback on your post but can say that we're all dealing with our own situations and if ranting on here helps then hey, why not... weve all done it ;)
Just want to say welcome and I'm sure others will as well. No, it's not just you, my son's illness flares up from time to time, usually when he's stressed out about something. Unfortunately I can't always smooth things over for him, however much I want to. :cry:

I'm so glad this is one of your 'good' times.
Hello. Glad you have come to join us. Being a carer to someone with a mental health condition is tough and I'm sure many of us can empathise with your egg shells. I love coming on here because we can all share the good, the bad and the ugly of our situation without feeling judged or out of place.
Hi, my mother had MH issues (possibly bipolar, possibly schizophrenia, never formally diagnosed but DEFINITELY had something!), and when you said 'walking on eggshells' it resonated immediately. My bro and dad and me spent our lives 'walking on eggshells' around mum, and always vetting what we said and did, in case it 'sent her on a bender' (she could do benders for England!).

We had to learn to 'manage' her (sometimes we succeeded, sometimes we didn't), but she could go 'volcanic' at the drop of a hat (or a comment we didn't realise would set her off).

I've seen something similar with another family member who has 'alcohol issues' - when too much alcohol has been imbibed, the slightest sense of 'criticism' can ruin the entire evening, and all the 'wrongs suffered' come biting out and it turns into Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf. More bloody eggshells....

So, yes, I do, for one, know what it's like to have to be on your 'guard' the whole time, and pussy-foot and pander and soothe and calm down etc etc etc.

It takes its toll - it definitely takes its toll. (However much one loves them...)

This site is brilliant for 'venting' - and far better to do it here in a safe place, where it can cause no pain or hurt or damage.

All best, Jenny
Hello and welcome :)