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New Member - Carers UK Forum

New Member

Tell us a bit about yourself here.
I have been a carer for many years, firstly for my father whom I nursed through his final months of cancer and who died in September 2010. Following his death my mother (who is nearly 92) was diagnosed with vascular dementia. At first this was just a bit inconvenient, and we coped very well, even going on holiday together (we have all lived as an extended family for many years). But over the past 6 months my mother's condition has deteriorated much quicker. Anything out of the norm throws her into confusion and turmoil. Thursday of last week she went to my sister's for a week whilst my husband and I went to Paris for a long weekend (a Christmas present from my son!) but the trauma of getting everything ready for her to go, and her eventual leaving with my son who was driving her to Suffolk, left me completely broken and emotionally drained. I was very, very frightened at how ill I felt, and how uncontrollably hysterical my crying was once she had left, which is when I started asking various people about "help". Counselling, mentoring, anything to help me through what is obviously only going to get worse. Then a friend suggested I registered with Carers UK, and I hope that by so doing I can talk to like-minded people who have maybe "been there, done that, and got the T-shirt"! I look forward to making many new friends.
hello Louise. I haven't actually any experience with dementia but I am sure other members will be along soon to not only welcome you to the forum but offer advice too.

A warm welcome from me!

Bell x
Hello Louise and welcome to the forum Image

Quite a few of us have experience of caring for someone with one form of dementia or another; my own Mum had Alzheimer's and I well remember the emotional rollercoaster I rode at the time (sadly she passed away in March 2012). The Alzheimer's Society also has a very good website with lots of information on all the various forms of dementia - they also have a very good range of publications some are free to download. You'll find them here : http://alzheimers.org.uk/?gclid=CI39haK ... tAodrUgAcg.

The one thing I learnt above all else was that I had to take time out for myself; days out and weekend breaks became important times to allow me to recharge my batteries. I was no use to anyone if I became ill !

There is a section further down the forum index on specific illnesses/disabilities and within that there is a section devoted to Dementia; you may find some of the topics there useful. If you have any specific questions, post away and someone is bound to have some advice.
Hi and welcome. My mother is almost 93. One of the things I've learnt through caring for her is that you have to be able to step away at times - preferably physically, but at the very least emotionally.

How was Paris? Feel free to post photos in the social section for the benefit of a poor little koala from Oz. Image
Welcome to the forum. When my son with LD went into residential care I too sobbed and sobbed, like a mini breakdown. For the first time in 16 years I wasn.
, t running round like a hamster in a wheel. You have probably done too much for too long? First step must be a needs sssesment and carers assessment from social services to see what is available locally to you.
Hi Louise, and welcome

Phoebe xx
Thank you for your welcomes. We are having a better day today so my mantra is now "one day at a time", and I shall not try to cross bridges before I get to them, which I must admit I had been doing. If I can be more laid back, I am sure my mother will be happier for it. It's good to know there are friends out there. Image