Mum deteriorated in hospital-part 2
Posted: Sun Feb 13, 2022 1:01 pm
Hi there everyone,
A little back ground on mum, she is late dementia most likely stage 6 she has full heart block and has terminal breast cancer also insulin injection for diabetics, so really not a well lady. But she is still fully Mobil around her home 70% incontinence. Myself and sister are her main carers.
I feel I’m getting no answers from either doctor or OH at the hospital. Mum went to A&E 5 weeks ago because she fell at home, not injured herself but the carer had rang an ambulance so they had to take her to make sure she was ok, as she did express pain when they picked her up. On arrival she tested positive for COVID even though she sis not display any symptoms, so my sister was told to leave the hospital straight away. Therefore, having to leave mum on her own, mum does not communicate and she is in her own little world of chat. Then late on that evening get a call to say come and collect her as she has no medical needs. Found mum 12 hours still on a trolley on the corridor very dehydrated, only had one cup of tea and no food in those 12 hours. I could not wait to take her home, but she was in so much pain when I tried to get her to sit up. So I asked the doctor if she had been X-ray, but no she had not. So I was told she could not go home until this had been done. But now I think she was in pain because she had been left on that trolley along with no fluids that she was just stiff as her x ray showed no injures.
So for the next week got so many phone calls from the hospital asking for us to take mum home, but she was not Mobil so how could we. She had just been left on her bed for over a week. The hospital then realised even though I told them so many times mum was fully mobile at home before hospital. They then tried to get mum mobile but mum does not 7nderstand any form of instruction so this was proving difficult so eventually they asked us to go in and assist them with this even though there is a blanket band on relatives going into hospital. So in I went onto a COVID ward to assist, but mum could not even stand up let alone walk. I asked how often she was given physio and was astonished to find out out maybe three times a week. So needless to say I two days later I contracted COVID. So couple weeks go by cannot get through to ward at all to find out how mum is doing just don’t answer the phones. Now 5 weeks in and now she is not eating or drinking constantly on and off drips, now we are asked to go in and help feed her. All this going on and still get asked what we need in place to get her home
She clearly will now be bed bound and we do not know how to care for her like this, so I replied apart from obvious things like bed guards, mattress, camode, proper chair but most of all training.
But now the doctors are asking us if we are making the right decision in putting things in place to get her home and asking a lot of what if this happens what if that happens if she deteriorated would we re admit her or if she is end of life would we want her in a hospice. But not person has told us if she is at end of life or if she will only survive if she keeps getting rehydrated.
We really want mum to come home but we are in so much fear if she is being sent home to pass away and worry so much about pain relief for her. Having been in the system for many years I know what ever you need for someone you are for is a battle and time consuming effort and I fear the response would not be quick enough for mums sake. I have asked about a hospice but the doctors feel mum is not at this stage yet also mentioned the waiting list is so long. Then enquired about continuing health care but no not possible. I feel she should be able to get at least one of things as to be honest mum has reached this point I feel because she has not had the care she needs whilst being in hospital.
Even just simple things like mum will not drink water only juice I told juice into hospital and told the staff at least times to give her juice it’s the only thing she will drink, but no not even this has been done still giving her water. Told them of mums eating habits and sweet treats like dessert but no she is a dieabetic so she is not aloud. So they would rather not give a very sick lady who is terminal what she eats, therefore she has now stopped eating altogether and it’s as if she does not know how too anymore, but before hospital she was eating with a knife and fork.
I don’t really want to play the blame card but I do question all of what has happened.
Any advise would be much appreciated on how I can get some straight answers.
A little back ground on mum, she is late dementia most likely stage 6 she has full heart block and has terminal breast cancer also insulin injection for diabetics, so really not a well lady. But she is still fully Mobil around her home 70% incontinence. Myself and sister are her main carers.
I feel I’m getting no answers from either doctor or OH at the hospital. Mum went to A&E 5 weeks ago because she fell at home, not injured herself but the carer had rang an ambulance so they had to take her to make sure she was ok, as she did express pain when they picked her up. On arrival she tested positive for COVID even though she sis not display any symptoms, so my sister was told to leave the hospital straight away. Therefore, having to leave mum on her own, mum does not communicate and she is in her own little world of chat. Then late on that evening get a call to say come and collect her as she has no medical needs. Found mum 12 hours still on a trolley on the corridor very dehydrated, only had one cup of tea and no food in those 12 hours. I could not wait to take her home, but she was in so much pain when I tried to get her to sit up. So I asked the doctor if she had been X-ray, but no she had not. So I was told she could not go home until this had been done. But now I think she was in pain because she had been left on that trolley along with no fluids that she was just stiff as her x ray showed no injures.
So for the next week got so many phone calls from the hospital asking for us to take mum home, but she was not Mobil so how could we. She had just been left on her bed for over a week. The hospital then realised even though I told them so many times mum was fully mobile at home before hospital. They then tried to get mum mobile but mum does not 7nderstand any form of instruction so this was proving difficult so eventually they asked us to go in and assist them with this even though there is a blanket band on relatives going into hospital. So in I went onto a COVID ward to assist, but mum could not even stand up let alone walk. I asked how often she was given physio and was astonished to find out out maybe three times a week. So needless to say I two days later I contracted COVID. So couple weeks go by cannot get through to ward at all to find out how mum is doing just don’t answer the phones. Now 5 weeks in and now she is not eating or drinking constantly on and off drips, now we are asked to go in and help feed her. All this going on and still get asked what we need in place to get her home
She clearly will now be bed bound and we do not know how to care for her like this, so I replied apart from obvious things like bed guards, mattress, camode, proper chair but most of all training.
But now the doctors are asking us if we are making the right decision in putting things in place to get her home and asking a lot of what if this happens what if that happens if she deteriorated would we re admit her or if she is end of life would we want her in a hospice. But not person has told us if she is at end of life or if she will only survive if she keeps getting rehydrated.
We really want mum to come home but we are in so much fear if she is being sent home to pass away and worry so much about pain relief for her. Having been in the system for many years I know what ever you need for someone you are for is a battle and time consuming effort and I fear the response would not be quick enough for mums sake. I have asked about a hospice but the doctors feel mum is not at this stage yet also mentioned the waiting list is so long. Then enquired about continuing health care but no not possible. I feel she should be able to get at least one of things as to be honest mum has reached this point I feel because she has not had the care she needs whilst being in hospital.
Even just simple things like mum will not drink water only juice I told juice into hospital and told the staff at least times to give her juice it’s the only thing she will drink, but no not even this has been done still giving her water. Told them of mums eating habits and sweet treats like dessert but no she is a dieabetic so she is not aloud. So they would rather not give a very sick lady who is terminal what she eats, therefore she has now stopped eating altogether and it’s as if she does not know how too anymore, but before hospital she was eating with a knife and fork.
I don’t really want to play the blame card but I do question all of what has happened.
Any advise would be much appreciated on how I can get some straight answers.