Hi Everyone

[Amanda_18081]

Hi All

Thanks for the information and I realise that there may be tenancy related issues but it’s not a priority for me. He chooses not to discuss with me and therefore it’s his private business. In addition, unfortunately I still carry some resentments from the past as neither Mum nor brother made much of an effort to ever phone or write to me during my whole life whereas I’ve paid for things, picked them up, made sure they had a relationship with grandchildren etc. To put it bluntly they’ve been takers not givers. Not to say it doesn’t weigh on my mind considerably indeed but the only way to cope is to focus on my own priorities - life threatening and urgent issues are what takes precedence and I remind myself that my brother is a fully fledged adult with lines of communication to the relevant authorities which he’s either done already or not. Personally I think he either has his head in the sand or has received assurances that he chooses not to share. Getting any answers (and I mean any answers to questions like - are you an appointee, do you know what that means and does that mean you are in control of all finances?) on finances where I’m a bit more involved has been difficult enough let alone sorting out his housing issues and that is my main focus now as Mum shares bills etc.

[jenny lucas]

Well in which case, I agree, leave them to it! If your bro ends up homeless, well, that's his look out.

'Takers' don't change - they just get miffed if the 'being taken' start objecting!

And what goes around comes around - karma is all. They didn't bother about you when you could have done with their help/support/sympathy, so no reason for you to bother about them now.

Look after yourself, and not them. And please don't feel guilty.

(Takers never appreciate what others do, and never say thank you either!)

(BUT, they can only take from those who give....ie, if you stop giving, they can't take any longer!!!!!)