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Hi all .Thought it about time I said hello - Carers UK Forum

Hi all .Thought it about time I said hello

Tell us a bit about yourself here.
Hi everyone.
I joined some time ago but find i very difficult to talk about my problems and situation I have always been a very private person and fiercely independant. For 45 years I have been a provider for my family and have given advice and helped others in every way possible.

It is very difficult for me to admit that I am now way out of my confort zone and sometimes at a complete loss.

My Dad (with whom I had had very little contact for the past 30 years) phoned me 2x years ago and said that he couldn't manage. He had a few years previously lost his second Wife and had single-handedly nursed and cared for her . She had Parkinsons and Altziemers. At the age of 81 it was a pretty heroic effort but took its toll.

Dad had probably had a mini stroke and clearly had short term memory problems and was confused. His house was festooned with yellow sticky messages and reminder notes .

To cut a long story short I brought Dad home to stay with us and closed my Company down to become his full time carer. It has been a tough 2x year roller coaster of emotions for all of us and many times we have all been reduced to tears with the frustration and bewilderment of it all.

Dad has had several episodes of sudden deterioration but he is holding his own pretty well at the moment and I am sure that the donepezil hydrochloride that he is taking has helped arrest the progress of his Dementia.

I look forward to reading about other carer's lives and sharing some experiences with you all .
Hi Peanut and welcome to the forum.

Glad you finally came to say hello Image

I've cared for Mum (88 with Alzheimer's) for the last 5 years - the first 3 'at a distance' and then I moved in with her 2 years ago to care full time. Currently she is staying in a local care home for a trial period to see if she will settle, if so the trial will become a permanent placement.

Mum has been on Aricept for 4 years now but I don't think it is working as well as it once did as her decline has become much more rapid over the last 6 months to the point where, more often than not, she doesn't recognise me or my sister as her daughters; she also no longer recognises her home and is continually on the point of 'going home'. Every little thing fazes her and can send her into an agitated and verbally aggresive state.

I have found the last few years hard going and it has come to the point where I now feel that I can no longer continue as Mum's main carer - so a care home it has to be and then, maybe, I can reclaim the Mother/Daughter relationship we once had.
Hi peanut, glad you came to say 'hello' Image Image
Hi Peanut

Welcome to the forum. I too find it difficult to talk to people in person about my feelings and thoughts regarding caring for my partner. I also value my privacy but I reached crisis point and needed someone to talk openly to. This forum gives me the freedom to do this without anyone passing judgement on me or manipulating me for their own advantage. Nobody has a hidden agenda on here, we're here to listen to each other, help where we can and ultimately support one another in our caring roles.

I haven't been a member for very long but found this forum so valuable and I hope you do too. Image
hi Peanut and welcome, there are lots of friendly on here Image Image