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Hi - Page 2 - Carers UK Forum

Hi

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Hi,

A very difficult situation and you do have to think of your own mental health. Personally, I would write to Social Services and your mum's GP expressing your concerns (same letter). Her GP may well refuse to deal with you but they would read a letter. I had to do this myself to get my mum's GP to take my concerns seriously. It may not have any result but as they are clearly known to Social Services, it may keep your mum's case on their radar screen.

Really I think that is all you can do. It is good that your sister is at least in contact but a very sad situation for all concerned.

I wish you luck,
Anne
Vince_2005 wrote:
Tue May 19, 2020 10:24 am
Hi Angela
You don't say how far away you are from them geographically?
Or what their living arrangements are, do they live in their own home that they have been in for a number of years, since they were more able?
My experience of social services in the London Borough where my mother lives and my late aunt also lived before she had to go in a home was that they were spectacularly useless, beyond useless

We found that unless you have power of attorney, including medical, the GP would not talk to us about our aunt, even when she was spiralling out of control. My mother was her registered next of kin but that apparently made no difference..

We had power of attorney but not medical.

What you have to realise is you are not alone. Stay with it

Vince
Hi Vince

I live about 13 miles away from them. Yes, they've been in their own home for some time. Social services haven't been great to be honest.

I have got power of attorney jointly with my stepfather but because my mum has some capacity still there was nothing I could do to get her in a home. I have also got permission to speak to mum's doctor but because my stepfather wants to be in control and my mum sides with him I'm helpless.

Thank you for your help.

Angela
Anne001 wrote:
Tue May 19, 2020 10:39 am
Hi,

A very difficult situation and you do have to think of your own mental health. Personally, I would write to Social Services and your mum's GP expressing your concerns (same letter). Her GP may well refuse to deal with you but they would read a letter. I had to do this myself to get my mum's GP to take my concerns seriously. It may not have any result but as they are clearly known to Social Services, it may keep your mum's case on their radar screen.

Really I think that is all you can do. It is good that your sister is at least in contact but a very sad situation for all concerned.

I wish you luck,
Anne
Hi Anne

I've had to tread very carefully because of my stepfather. They have told social services that they don't want the interference from the family and want to be left alone to do things their way (or really my stepfather's way).

I think it may be a good idea to write to mum's doctor.

Thank you for your advice

Angela