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Karen_1906123456 Online
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- Posts: 1
- Joined: Sat Jun 15, 2019 2:35 pm
Sun Aug 18, 2019 10:52 am
Hi everyone
Gosh, I am relieved this thread is still running after 4 years! I haven’t read every post but probably enough to see there are many people in a similar situation.
My mother is 86 and registered blind. Last summer, after an accidental bowel perforation, haemorrhage, sepsis, 11 days in Intensive Care and 5 weeks in hospital, she lost vision from being confined, and suffered memory loss; she was given a stoma. She went in 5 weeks from being almost totally independent (other than needing help with reading and admin) to mostly dependent. Carers come twice a day to change her bag as she can’t see to do it herself. I do everything else other than personal care.
Of course, it was assumed that I would look after her. I automatically stepped in initially without realising the long-term implications - which you can guess. I wasn’t very close to Mum; she had three husbands, was a strong businesswoman, highly extravert. She has always been loquacious, feisty, quick to anger over trivial things, theatrical, less than straightforward. I am introverted, a biologist, peace loving, anxious.. I am with her from 5 to 12 hours a day. And yes, I scream at her when she resists all suggestions of anyone else helping her, mainly because she screams when I suggest it.
Blimey, that’s a rambling intro ... i hope some of you are still reading...
Maybe more later ...
Best wishes
K