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[Pamela_1610]

Hello I am new ,could anyone please offer me some advice
My dad was in hospital in July til September this year,with pneumonia,sepsis,he had vascular dementia,have just found out after a dat scan in March this year,that he has Parkinson's and Lewy body dementia,he went under the net like lots of others.a package of care was set up while he was in hospital 4 times a day but when he got home I just said he needed the morning call as he would go to the toilet when he wanted to go not wait for the carers to come and take him,also the carers were trying to put him to bed after they had showered my disabled brother at 7.30 pm which was way too early for him.i have no care plan for my dad no personal budget or assessment .the social worker that came out to us is not at all helpful I asked that as we don't get calls 4 times a day could we maybe get someone to sit with my dad for a few hours twice a week so that I could get my mum out for a break,no was the answer.i really don't know what to do.i want to keep my dad at home for as long as poss but it just seems that you are left to get on with it.i go down to my dad at 7.30 am to take him to the toilet,give him breakfast and medication,then I pop home at 9am when carers are showering him,so that I can get a shower ,I then go back down about 10.30am and am there all day til 9-10 pm every day.i get no time to myself I can't leave my mum on her own with my dad as she can't cope as he is very unsteady on his feet and she's 78 and no spring chicken.nobody seems to want to know or help in any way.i know I can't keep this up for much longer can someone please tell me what I have to do to get more help with my dad,so that me and my mum can get a break thanks

[Scally]

Hi, and welcome.
Have you received a Carers Assessment yet? If not, that is your first step: phone social work first thing in the morning and demand one: it is your legal right.
Let us know how you get on ... be brave!

[Pamela_1610]

Thank you scally for your reply,no I haven't had carers assessment.i will ask for one a.s.a.p.all the social worker says that if we can't cope my dad will have to go into nursing home,but it would be out of our borough and that is my last resort as he went in for two weeks respite recently it was the worst two weeks of my life,and he was treated like a bag of rubbish

[bowlingbun]

Social Services should have done a Needs Assessment for dad and a Carers Assessment for you. There must be something somewhere along these lines for the initial care to have been arranged. Ask for copies of BOTH the assessments which should have been done (I suspect they weren't done properly) and then ask for them to be updated asap. It's really important that you detail everything that dad needs help with, that you do for him. Only after this should there be any discussion about direct payments, so that you can then arrange carers for times when it would help, not hinder you. This would also be a good time for your disabled brother to have his assessment updated as well.

[Pamela_1610]

Thankyou bowling bun for your advice,apparently my dads assessment was done in hospital.so I have asked for a new one to be done as well as carers assessments for me and my mum.social services they can only offer 4 hours home respite a week,which is better than nothing but not enough.this is so frustrating

[bowlingbun]

If it,s not enough, then complain, and say you won't be able to continue caring without more help.