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new today - Carers UK Forum

new today

Tell us a bit about yourself here.
hi everyone......i am a mum of two, 14 and 12 years old, and my parents are currently living with me.......am also a full time midwife and spend my days on my feet........i never thought of myself as a carer until my sister called me one last night....my mum had a series of mini strokes a few years ago which mucked up her short term memory plus she had a few mental issues which are currently resolved...my dad has had a kidney stone partially removed and currently has a stent and catheter......he is back for more surgery at the end of this month......
i have felt stressed to the point where i had a mini panic attack when i thought of having them here for another six months........and literally felt the hair at my temple turning grey at the thought....i have felt guilty for wanting my non existent life back.........i have felt guilty for being an awful daughter and mother.....my sister tells me of her day, going to work coming home and doing what she desires while her husband cooks and then she relaxes and i know she thinks i am making a fuss about nothing..my brothers idea of support is 'that's how old people are'.........
having read some of ur posts i feel like i am fussing about nothing but i feel and hope i can get a little solace and understanding here........
thanks for letting me moan
Hi sandbag, moan away Image
It really helps to let off steam, and welcome Image
You've got past the first step of logging on so welcome to the forum. We can all feel stretched to the point of cracking up but somehow you get the strength to go on. I hope you find something to help you here, if only to let off steam. Nice to meet you. Respect for being a midwife!!
welcome Sandbag...I´ve done my share of ranting on here since I joined a few days ago too! Makes you feel so much better knowing that people are actually listening!

I have a sister too...otherwise known as Lord Lucan....hasn´t been seen or heard of since Mum´s health has deteriorated and the money has run out! Such is life!
Hi Sandbag and welcome,
This forum is great and people will come along who are friendly and supportive. You are not fussing about nothing at all and you sound like a wonderful mother and daughter and don't let anyone tell you any different. Look forward to your posts Image
Bluebird Image
Welcome Sandbag Image

My Life Rules for Carers :

DO NOT ever feel guilty for wanting your life back
DO NOT ever feel that you are a bad daughter
DO NOT stop making a fuss
NEVER apologise for being short tempered; impatient or frustrated

you are entitled - you are a CARER.

and never, ever diminish what you do.

You are a Very Important Person and deserve respect and consideration for what you do.

I too, have a sister who tells me to 'go with the flow' - only problem is that she doesn't have to. I care for my 85 year old Mum who has dementia and a lot of mobility problems virtually single handed so can relate to your situation. Other Forum members also have similar stories to tell so we allknow where you're coming from. Feel free to rant and rave - no-one will think badly of you; we've all been there; done that etc, etc.

best wishes & (((((((hugs)))))))))
Hi Sandbag,

Adding my welcome too.Hope you find the forum of benefit to you.You will certainly find people here will understand what you are going through and help support you.

Hi Sandbag nice to meet you and welcome to the forum
welcome to the site me dear!

some how i think u will fit right in and suddenly feel normal
Just wanted to say hi and welcome to the forum.
You are definetley not alone in your feelings, its great to have this forum to share your worries and rants to people who can totally relate to you!!
Your life sounds as manic as mine.

Li x