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PTSD , mixed personality disorder and depression - Carers UK Forum

PTSD , mixed personality disorder and depression

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Hi anyone
My partner has all of the above and I really need advice as lately he is making me very on edge .
He is actually being a bit of a narcissist and we have been here before . I don't really know what to do I'm thinking of contacting are mental health team but he thinks I'm threaten him with this but he is acting irrational again. He sneakily booked in to see a medium with out telling me and booked it for a Time when I would be at work in the hope I wouldn't find out about it . However our 2 yr old was watching you tube on his phone and flicked over the screens and it landed on his WhatsApp message to this medium which he had arranged yesterday not mentioned to me at all so I confronted and now I'm in the wrong as I went through his messages ! I really didn't he know says he has cancelled it but I don't know what to believe anymore he hurt me badly a yr ago sexting alot of women , escorts etc before his mental breakdown my gut is telling me he is going the same way again 🙄 I'm fed up with being in the wrong when he was the one in the wrong to begin with .any advice on what I should do please feeling lost and alone x
You have a son, and your first responsibility is for him. Is your partner his dad (can't take that as given these days!)?

If I said to you bluntly - what are you getting out of this relationship for yourself, and for your son, what would your answer be?

Sometimes situations worsen 'gradually' - or, as you describe, they have 'bad periods' that then improve, and then get bad again (cycling round and round).....so it can be hard to notice just how 'not good' a relationship is.

So, as I say, write down a list of the 'Good things' in your relationship, and then a list of the 'Bad things'. See which is longer....

His 'previous' doesn't make him a very attractive person to spend your life with alas.....
Hi I am new to the forum. But I care for my sister with an ' emotionally unstable' personality disorder, she also has PTSD anxiety and depression and agoraphobia.

Sadly you can be the only one to decide if you are willing or able to cope with your partner's mental health and behaviour.

But one thing that stood out for me in your post is that you feel in the wrong even tho he's the one being deceitful!!! ( And has been before) a personality disorder stems from emotional development issues so it seems it maybe the cause of previous behaviour too.

In my experience of dealing with personality disorder nothing you say or do is right! EVER!

There's a desperate need for them to manipulate and control relationships to avoid a wrongly perceived abandonment issue.

This may be part of a mental health disorder but also consider if this is domestic violence. Noone deserves to treated badly and made to feel like the villain, if you need advice from a mental health team then seek it. It's not a threat? I regularly feel used, threatened and resentful of my sister and just the thought of having to be with her causes severe anxiety in myself, like you say 'being on edge' constantly.
I chose to carry on despite it dragging me down but I'm not sure how easy that is for you when you have a two year old depending on you. You must look after YOURSELF!! first otherwise you'll be no good to anyone.
Good luck and take care
Look up 'secondary gain' - it's the 'benefits' someone gets from being mentally ill. Most notable of which is 'getting out' of any responsibility whatsoever for anyone else. 'Because they are illl'......