Wed May 18, 2011 11:17 am
hi im 32 years old and have recently started looking after my friends dad (who is disabled) who i have known for 20 odd years who i have been very close with he was living in london and was not being cared for very well by his daughter or his home helps so when his sister died from a stoke and i went to see him i couldnt belive the state he was living in so decided to ask if he would like to come and stay with me in clacton on sea for a while so i could look after him after his loss, this ending up being a perment thing where he gave up his tenancy in london and i moved so we could get a bigger place where we could live together with me my partner and our 2 young children and i could look after him aswell as give him company which he really did lack in london it has been fine for a while i had loads of help from social service and got lots of equitment to make my job easyer but now after 8 months im finding him being more demarnding of my own personal time i cant leave the house without feeling quilty that im not taking him with me even just to drop my kids off at school or do a little shoppping i would take him everywhere with me but it takes time to get him dressed and washed and in to his wheelchair and then in to the car so little jobs i have to do out seems pointless in taking him which i know is annoying him i also cant spend time on my own in my room with my partner without him calling me for something i know this sound so selfish on my behalf by i didnt sign up for all hes demanding which i have tryed to explain to him many times im not a out going person really i have my routine and always have he just makes me feel so guilty that HE made the wrong decion in moving but all i see is how i got him away from a hellish life am i so wrong in feeling this way and has anyone got any advise on what i can do about it