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Carers UK Forum • Feeling Distraught - Page 2
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Re: Feeling Distraught

Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2018 3:05 pm
by jenny lucas
Prudent advice. Can your mum still manage phoning you? if so, put it to answerphone and only phone back if it's an 'essential' call. Not just a 'COME HERE RIGHT NOW!' call!!!

Re: Feeling Distraught

Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2018 4:32 pm
by JHR57
Yes there is a keysafe and I haven't left any valuables at Mums for years..... carers came this morning to sort all the paperwork and details and I have been TOLD by my family that I must recharge my batteries and leave them to it....did have the doctor visit today after telling them i wasn't happy with their previous diagnosis...had Mums actual Doctor and not a locum and she was horrified that no one had instigated a dip urine test ...Mum did a wee doctor dipped and it was bright red...now a course of anti b's specifically for UTI....carers weren't phased at all said it was really common I'm now at home trying to sort our own house for Christmas but I'm not sure how I feel 18 years is a long time and it will take some getting used to .....Mum is really not happy !!! but hey oh I feel really drained xxxxxx

Re: Feeling Distraught

Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2018 4:37 pm
by jenny lucas
You've sacrificed 18 years to your mum. Time she started repaying that.

Tough if she's not happy. Just tough.

YOU come first for a change.

Re: Feeling Distraught

Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2018 4:42 pm
by bowlingbun
Day 1:
Stay in bed till late, long bath, lovely smellies, recliner, good book. Meal in the local garden centre. Lazy evening, early night.

Repeat!

Re: Feeling Distraught

Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2018 4:44 pm
by JHR57
Oh how I love you guys I don't post much but I very often pop on for reassurance and you certainly give it ...thank you ladies xxxxx

Re: Feeling Distraught

Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2018 4:47 pm
by jenny lucas
We help to 'show the way' and reassure you that you do NOT have to be the perpetual victim here.

Standing up for ourselves is hard - it helps if you've got other folk (eg,. us!) pushing you upwards!!!!

Re: Feeling Distraught

Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2018 5:24 pm
by Sally_17031
PLEASE recharge your batteries. I also came here in a desperate mess. Dad is now in a care home and Mum has carers in. Neither like it. But it is what is NEEDED for my sister and I to have some sort of normal life. 18months on life is much better. I have a job I love. I am no longer depressed. I am being a better mother to my kids. Someone on here (prob BB or Jenny??!) said be proud of what you have done and can do and not guilty about what you can't. Sounds as though you have been doing a mighty amazing job. Hold your head high and enjoy some time off from it all totally guilt free.

Happy Christmas. xx