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New to this forum. - Carers UK Forum

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Hi everyone, I'm Gill and am a carer for my 86 year old mother who has sight and mobility issues. Recently she has become very angry due to not coping with losing more of her independence. She is lashing out at those of us who are trying to help her. She has been diagnosed with severe anemia and her Dr organised a barrage of tests to find the cause but she has cancelled them all saying she cannot get transport which is totally untrue. She is lying to myself and my brother and seems to be playing us off against each other. We are at a loss as to how to help her. I am waiting for a call from her Dr to put them in the picture. I am hoping to get some advice from people on here who will have more experience than me dealing with such issues.
I'd like to add that all of this is so out of character for mum as she used to be fun and jolly. I know she is frustrated and probably scared but am struggling to know how to deal with it. I have Parkinsons disease myself and all this stress is making me ill. Thankyou for listening, Gill
Hi Gill

You poor mother, it is understandably frustrating and destabilising.

You may find other forums helpful too such as RNIB for the emotional side of sight loss, if she has a dry macular or wet macular eye condition they have a website too which could help as well.
If your mum is under the eye clinic, there should be someone they can get to see your mother about aids and the emotional side.

Please keep checking back for replies from others.
Gill_2209 wrote:
Fri Sep 09, 2022 10:48 am
Hi everyone, I'm Gill and am a carer for my 86 year old mother who has sight and mobility issues. Recently she has become very angry due to not coping with losing more of her independence. She is lashing out at those of us who are trying to help her. She has been diagnosed with severe anemia and her Dr organised a barrage of tests to find the cause but she has cancelled them all saying she cannot get transport which is totally untrue. She is lying to myself and my brother and seems to be playing us off against each other. We are at a loss as to how to help her. I am waiting for a call from her Dr to put them in the picture. I am hoping to get some advice from people on here who will have more experience than me dealing with such issues.
I'd like to add that all of this is so out of character for mum as she used to be fun and jolly. I know she is frustrated and probably scared but am struggling to know how to deal with it. I have Parkinsons disease myself and all this stress is making me ill. Thankyou for listening, Gill
Hugs
Dear Gill_2209
My name is Kristie and i am a volunteer online community host for Carers UK. I am sorry to hear of the difficult situation you find yourself in and i would like to say that in this message i am going to give you the Carers UK telephone number and email address for you to contact Carers UK. I would also like to say that your fellow Carers are very wise people and i am sure that they will be able to help you.
So, welcome to the Forum! You are not alone in your caring role and i am sure that many on here will understand exactly how you feel and will offer you the support that you need. Caring can be a very lonely time and the pandemic has made caring responsibilities challenging as many carers have been socially restricted and unable to attend social groups etc.
Carers UK are running two online weekly meet ups for carers and you can find the information on how to register at Care For A Cuppa:-https://www.carersuk.org/help-and-advic ... ne-meetups. The second online weekly meet up is called Share And Learn:-https://www,carersuk.org/help-and-advice/get-support/share-and-learn-online-sessions.
Carers UK telephone number is 0808 808 7777 and the line is open from Monday to Friday between the hours of 9am-6pm and the email address is (advice@carersuk.org).
They provide information and guidance to unpaid carers. This covers:-
-Benefits And Financial Support
-Your Rights As A Carer In The Workplace
-Carers Assessments And How To Get Support In Your Caring Role
-Services Available To Carers And The People You Care For
-How To Complain Effectively And Challenge Decisions
Best Wishes
Kristie.