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Desperate for Sleep - Page 2 - Carers UK Forum

Desperate for Sleep

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101 posts
Right , will update tomorrow .. thank you
Good luck.
Hi again, still don't have any new advice, but just wanted to say I'm so so pleased you managed a few good hours sleep today - must really have made a difference at least for a little while xx
Hi Robin,
the only way I got any help from the professionals was by 'throwing my toys out the pram' as Bowlingbun suggested.
I'm Devon SS here and as soon as they realised that I was at the end of my tether, they pulled out all the stops for me.
My wife has vascular dementia and back then she was a real handful to cope with.
I had to get her in a home where she stayed for a year.
I caught up my sleep knowing she was safe and happy in there. She didn't sleep for a month an exhausted the night staff so much that one of them had to take two nights off to recuperate.
They said they didn't know how I had coped on my own for so long.
She got much better and after a year in the home I decided I could manage her back home with me.
The pro's were dead against it, but I knew it was the right thing for me and Jill.
That was 2011 - 2012 and she's been ok ever since. The brain has a way of repairing itself and managed it in my wifes case to some degree.
I hope you get Essex SS to help you more. Good luck with it. Pete. :)
thank you for your message of kindness,

Update , i was promised a callback from Social services , that never happened..

I have txted mums social worker 3 times asking for help regarding the sleeping issue, no reply ...

Monday , I will once again make myself a nonsense ... i'm sleeping during the day where possible, using a baby gate to stop my mum moving around the house...keeping her safe..

This is a awful situation for me because i have no life and my mother is not getting out so much so her behaviour is deteriorating ...
Is this your local office? On Monday, ring the Director of Social Services at County Level. SSD at County level will also have a Complaints Officer (may have a slightly different title). Ring both of them. Make sure you now get email addresses for everyone you deal with. Also the email address of the County Councillor in charge of the SSD Committee, and every time you write to any officer, copy it to him or her. Do the same for the most local member of the council SSD committee. This will be available from the internet. It is so easy to bombard people with emails. Each different person in the council will then copy their email to the Complaints Officer.
hi, I've sent a email to the councillor overlooking SSD ...

Once again I asked to speak to the PA of the person in charge of Social Services...

I have made a online complaint...

Still no medication for mum to help her sleep...

contacted 111, the doctor I spoke to will send a strongly worded letter to my mums gp..

Yesterday received this from my mums social worker..
Hi Robin,

Apologies, Yolande is on training today and I have just come back from leave, when we last left this I had agreed for the sitting service funding to be put back in and Yolande was going to do the paperwork, I also recall some mention of a possible request for respite on the form of a residential break.

Can you confirm what you are expecting to be arranged and I’ll follow up?


I have txted Yolande three times over a period of a couple days asking her for help in getting something to help my mum sleep at night ...

I replied , can i have your managers details please ....

I'm dismayed that you still haven't got what you need. Hopefully your LA website has contact details for every councillor on the SSD committee. All I can suggest is thst you copy your email to every member of the committee today (make a "group" so you only have to type all the addrresses once). Head the email with today's date, and then if no action today, resend it to everyone tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. Also copy to the head of the entire LA. If nothing has happened in 7 days, copy to your local paper. It's a total disgrace.
hi, I got a response

To help us with our enquiries, please could you confirm your mother’s name and address?

A response will be prepared and will be sent to you within 10 working days.

Kind regards


Julie Thomas
Cabinet Support Officer
Cabinet Office
Corporate Services
Not good enough. Contact her again and say she is treating it as routine paperwork issue whilst it needs to be treated with the utmost urgency by officers actually doing something, because you haven't had any support since.... However, I see that she is from the cabinet office. Has she actually contacted the head of the SSD committee at all? Somehow I doubt it. Have you had any response from the Director of Social Services office? He should be kicking his local officers to do what they are paid to do.
101 posts