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Elaine Online
- Member

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- Posts: 1902
- Joined: Fri Oct 04, 2013 9:40 pm
- Location: Yorkshire
Sat Aug 03, 2019 10:05 pm
by
Elaine » Sat Aug 03, 2019 10:05 pm
Hi Alan,
Welcome.
So sorry to hear that your wife is suffering from this awful disease at such a young age. I have very little experience because my mother was very old and at the end of her life when she began to have ‘strange’ ideas and it did upset me at first. Many people on her are much more knowledgeable.
I have read and believe that to disagree and argue is not the way to cope. Others here have said previously that it is better to go along with it and change the subject as soon as you can then there is no upset and your wife will probably forget what she said.
I suppose it depends whether she has hallucinations, such as seeing someone in the room or a cat on the settee for example or whether it confabulation where she might say that she has been shopping or for a bus ride for example, when you know she has done no such thing.
I have heard –and I am no expert- that to go along with it and ‘pretend’ with her, briefly, helps her to dismiss the thought sooner. Also you might find that she ‘forgets’ that people she knew are no longer alive. If she asks if you have spoken to her deceased relative for example, don’t insist that the person is dead but lie kindly by saying ‘No, but I’ll try tomorrow. Shall I make you a cup of tea?’.
Calm, quiet answers which guide her away from the current delusion will help you both cope, or so I have read.
There is a load of information which will help you to read on the Alzheimer’s website, which covers all kinds of dementia. The previous post has given you the link.
Have you got any support or help at the moment? Are you still working full time?
There is a lot of information and help on this site which members will be only too pleased to help you with if you keep posting.
KInd Regards
Elaine