Caring For Relative Who Hears Voices

[seagullz]

My adult son has started hearing voices and talking back to them in the last few months, it got particularly bad coming up to Christmas with him shouting at them all to leave him alone and (eff) (sorry for the language) off. Then banging his bedroom walls in frustration when he is alone.
Its disconcerting to say the least, he is seeing someone once a week for CBT (he has seen them twice now) it seems to help when he expresses himself to them. I found a local hearing voices group which he went to earlier this week and he said he will go next week.
But he will not talk to me about it at all though I try to be accepting he just seems to judge himself and the voices really harshly and is afraid of my reaction (I think) either way he refuses to speak to me about it.
I just found myself crying for a little while and wanted some support really and to see if there is anyone in the same boat as me, Hello and thanks for this forum btw.

[Melly1]

Hi Seagullz,

welcome to the forum.

I don't have direct experience of caring for someone with mental health problems, but others on here do. Hopefully they will be along with advice and support.

This must be difficult for both you and your son to live with.

It sounds like you have managed to find your son some support, which is no mean feat. Does he take medication too? Unfortunately, treatment takes time to take effect.

If you haven't looked at the Mind website it's worth a visit, to learn more about his condition and how you can best support him https://www.mind.org.uk

Melly1

[sunnydisposition]

Just a google search ....

https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/a-to-z/h/hearing-voices

Has some useful information and good links.

You are already doing an amazing job. Give yourself a pat on the back. No many people could stick with such a situation.

Try although very hard to look at the positives. You have managed to get him out of(albeit for attendance at the hearing voice group) the home. And he is started to attended the sessions. Focus on this for now for your son.

You need to try and link up to a local carers group. As you need your own support network.

[Debra_16011]

Hi and welcome to the forum. I have had the same experience with my son when he was 17 he started hearing voices and they stressed him out so much he would react angrily smash things and scream at them . It was upsetting and distressing for all of us and we dreaded co.ing home from work . My son was diagnosed with schizophrenia eventually and it has been a long hard road but he now accepts it is an illness takes his medication and is stable at present. One thing that helped me enormously I did a free online course from futurelearn called caring for someone with psychosis and schizophrenia and it helped me understand that these voices are not imagined he is actually hearing them the hearing part of the brain is active exactly as if I were talking to him. Once I understood that it all made a lot more sense how frightened and distressed he must be. I had to calm him by saying things like I can't hear what you're hearing but it must be very distressing for you he seemed to appreciate that I was acknowledging that he could hear them . I wish u good luck sorry for lo g post but I totally understand what you are going through

[Vanessa_2001]

Hi my son began to hear voices and is currently on a section 3. He has had exactly the same except he was smashing up his things, shouting and screaming causing a disturbance. The advice I was given while he was still at home was to go along with whatever he said about the voices. Not to challenge him when agitated.
It is very frightening for the person and distressing for the ones witnessing it. It's true you need to talk.
I don't have any great advice but maybe it helps to know there are other people who are going through similar with their lives ones.

[seagullz]

Thank you for the helpful replies. He is not on medication, before all this happened we tried to eat healthy and take multivitamins, omega three etc. So my son is still going out on long walks to keep healthy and takes a multi vitamin now and then.
I have googled to find support groups as a carer where I live.
My son is doing ok, he is still talking to the voices almost constantly, I empathize with him as much as I can when he yells out constantly eventually I will try to talk to him about it, he went to a voices meeting last evening, which seems to help.
He has sprained his hand hitting things in his room in frustration late last night so I am worried. But after that he got relatively calm and has gone out for a long walk today.
I can glimpses of the old him in there, I just need to help him deal with these voices. It seems to be about being true to yourself and not expressing yourself, keeping things in and changing that to expressing more at least thats what he said to me last night. He does have tendency to bottle things up. What I want to do is get him to somewhere where he can talk about what he is going through in a safe and non judgemental space. The voices meeting is helping but the voices are so constant and causing him so much distress, I have asked him to ask for a talking therapy as he absolutly refuses to speak much about it to me because Im his mum. He said he will ask next week so we will see what happens. I really appreciate the support on here it is helping me.

[Karen _2002]

Hi
I'm I. The Same position as you. My son too hears voices and it's very distressing to witness. I've only just joined this forum so it's comforting to know I'm not the only one.
I think Xmas seems to be. A trigger for these things happening. My son is also in the early stages of condition and sees earlt intervention services as well as the crisis team daily as meds were not working. I wonder if you have something like that in your area? Maybe your gp could help point you in the right direction.
Most of all I feel for you because I know how hard it is to cope with this. Best wishes and a hug to you

[Allie_1411]

Hello everyone! I’m knew here, but my 25 year old daughter has been hearing voices since 2014. I’ve never ‘met’ another parent going through something similar, which is why I joined. I know it can’t just be our family, but it often feels like it. Sending big hugs to you all xx

[Andy1710]

Hi
Carer for my wife for 15yrs .Auditory hallucinations are constant 24/7.Derogatory and abusive also threats of violence and every voice is real life experience to her.I had 7 yrs of violence towards me .None of the meds prescribed helped other than turn her into a zombie sleeping 16 hrs a day.
In the early days I would be confronted many times because of these voices and react in a manner anyone else would do being unaware of what was happening.
My reactions were like a trigger to her and would feed these voices.Anyway has time passed and the more experienced I gained I learnt the hard way .No help from family etc.
For example she would be talking out loud to her voices and would say there’s 30 ppl at the back gate coming to hurt her....... I asked her to ask them who wanted tea or coffee.Instantly that connected to her own thought process and no more was said.
Don’t get me wrong it’s not been always that easy but that 1 experience changed her outlook.
She still hears them 24/7.....but we have learnt to control things together.
1 last thing though.......always expect the unexpected with Mental Health .