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- Member
Tue Aug 06, 2019 8:16 pm
Hi everyone I'm new to this forum,
My Mother had dementia and my daughter is her carer, and has been for the past 3 years.
So to cut a long story short, we are at the end of our tether and cannot manage my Mother.
I have had to ring emergency services on a number of occasions because of my mum's violent and abusive behaviour, my daughter rings me crying and having panic attacks as she does not k ow what to do?
My mother constantly stays in bed eating all her meals in bed, food is dropped everywhere and she will not wash at all, has not had a bath in 3 years she has got all the equipment to help her into the bath etc. (Electric Bath seat) which has never been used.
We cannot force her to do these things, she also has a very nasty bed sore on her backside covering a very large area, we have taken her to docs about 2 months ago she was given anti biotic cream and oral anti biotics as the doc said it is infected.
She will not use the cream or take the pills and uses excuse after excuse we are now worried about sepsis!
Today I Contacted the older people's mental health team (Memory clinic) who are involved in her care.
I explained that she is at risk in so many ways t(oo many to mention here) and feel like we are not managing, I questioned detaining her in hospital under section 3 for treatment?
He wrote back to me saying he has referred her to their occupational therapist.
I am so confused as to what she can do for my mother? Has anybody had experience of this? And why are they so reluctant to detain her for treatment? As I feel this is a case of serious self neglect?
Am I being wicked and cruel I feel guilty for saying it but we cannot cope it's making me and my daughter ill.
Thankyou for any advice in advance.
My Mother had dementia and my daughter is her carer, and has been for the past 3 years.
So to cut a long story short, we are at the end of our tether and cannot manage my Mother.
I have had to ring emergency services on a number of occasions because of my mum's violent and abusive behaviour, my daughter rings me crying and having panic attacks as she does not k ow what to do?
My mother constantly stays in bed eating all her meals in bed, food is dropped everywhere and she will not wash at all, has not had a bath in 3 years she has got all the equipment to help her into the bath etc. (Electric Bath seat) which has never been used.
We cannot force her to do these things, she also has a very nasty bed sore on her backside covering a very large area, we have taken her to docs about 2 months ago she was given anti biotic cream and oral anti biotics as the doc said it is infected.
She will not use the cream or take the pills and uses excuse after excuse we are now worried about sepsis!
Today I Contacted the older people's mental health team (Memory clinic) who are involved in her care.
I explained that she is at risk in so many ways t(oo many to mention here) and feel like we are not managing, I questioned detaining her in hospital under section 3 for treatment?
He wrote back to me saying he has referred her to their occupational therapist.
I am so confused as to what she can do for my mother? Has anybody had experience of this? And why are they so reluctant to detain her for treatment? As I feel this is a case of serious self neglect?
Am I being wicked and cruel I feel guilty for saying it but we cannot cope it's making me and my daughter ill.
Thankyou for any advice in advance.
