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Hi Debbie
Welcome and please do change your forum name- you are not a bad carer!!!!! It sounds like you are doing the work of a whole team of carers so welcome to the foum and I hope you gain some strength from sharing with others. There are several people on the foum who are going through similar overload and other former carers who have the t shirt so to speak.
Are you getting any outside help at all at the moment?