I am 61 carer for my husband who has neuropathy, cant cook anymore. I feel like head cook and bottle washer. No sex as has had operation for cancer. He is not well, Did not think I would be caring now at my age. Not sure if I love him anymore. Even though he is a good man and we have been through alot together even losing a child Anyone any ideas how I can get through this hard time.
I was suddenly widowed when I was 54, my husband had a massive heart attack in his sleep. I have built a new life now, but I miss him every day.
Three months later I was nearly killed in a car accident, saved only by the fact I was driving his Range Rover, not my Escort. Unfortunately I was disabled and unable to walk properly for years until I had two knee replacements.
New Years Day we should be celebrating our Golden Wedding Anniversary.
None of us know what life will throw at us, all we can do is make the most of what we have. Try to concentrate on what you can do together and enjoy, but at the same time allow yourself to grieve for what has lost, especially the plans for a happy retirement etc.
How much physical caring are you doing? Do you ever get a day off?
I had a very difficult few years, widowed, disabled, 30 tons of lorry spares to manage, a disabled housebound mum, ended up in long term care, and then my brother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Two entire houses to sort out in two years. i'm regarded as a very "strong" woman, but even the strongest has a breaking point.
I had counselling, which changed my life, helped me sort out my own priorities, and stop me feeling a permanent failure as everyone wanted all of me, and I had no time to myself.
Ask your GP to arrange counselling, if you can possibly afford it, have private counselling, so it can continue as long as you need it, not limited to a number of sessions.
It was life changing for me, I just wish I'd had it much earlier in life!