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Adult son with mental health issues - Page 2 - Carers UK Forum

Adult son with mental health issues

Tell us a bit about yourself here.
I have just been frantically searching the internet for advice on coping with my adult son and his MH issues and I came across your post! It literally could have been me writing that post as I’m in exactly the same predicament right now! :(
I k ow you posted this over a year ago but I’d love to know how things are now with your son?
My son has always been a bit ‘different’ but I can’t pinpoint what that is? What is ASD you mention and what are the traits of this in your so please?
Did he end up going to his supported accommodation?
I hope you receive this message..
Hi I’m 57 and my 31yr old son hasn’t been diagnosed with anything as I can’t get him to go to the Drs. He has had problems since 13 with cannabis and treats me like shit as always demands money etc. He has never held down a job for more than 8-9mths as he doesn’t like being told what to do. He also never attended high school even though I tried everything. Reading your stories it just sounds like my son. It’s breaking my heart. He lives on his own in a brand new build which I furnished for him but everything is never good enough and it’s all my fault. He threatens to take his life if I don’t give him money.
Today I had a massive argument with him as he turned aggressive in the middle of Aldi at 2 young lads while I was trying to shop. I walked out and just exploded at him for his behaviour. I now want to know how I go about getting him help before he actually injures someone or someone lashes out at him for his disgusting behaviour. I’ve really had enough and want him sectioned in order to get the help he needs BUT will this actually make any difference as he thinks he’s ‘fine’ nothing wrong.
Hi Shona
Did you ever get the help with your son?
I’m in the same boat.
I posted a comment t just above yours on this thread.
It would be great to hear how you’re doing.
So sad to hear all of these people living such difficult lives.

My son is 38. I am 65. He has recently been diagnosed on the autistic spectrum. The diagnosis achieved nothing other than a diagnosis.
My son is not a horrible person, but can not live without support. His support is me.
My obligation to him as a mother begins to feel like a prison sentence, and that I've been given life.
I am sure that if I leave him to his own devices he will fail, and will suffer.

This creates a huge dilemma for me. In the natural scheme of things our children grow into adulthood and lead independent lives. I want some life for myself and this urge is growing stronger.

I'm in a lose lose situation.
If I carry on with no changes, I remain obliged to him.
If I leave him to his own devices I will be beside myself with worry waiting for the inevitable to happen, and then be filled with guilt when it does.

How rubbish is that!

I'm not really asking for anything, just commenting / venting / being filled with despair and the unrelentness nature of it all.