Hi - I haven't been that active on this forum but, for what it's worth would just like to share my transition.
I have been a carer for my mother for 10 years. The first 8 years were part-time, the last 2 years where I moved in with her and cared for her full time, following her 2nd stroke and heart attack. She had a stroke and, although still mobile, had vascular dementia. (It angers me knowing that the reason she got a stroke in the first place was that they took her off viox too slowly. It is an American drug and they had to take it off the market in US due to its links to strokes).
She is now ensconced in a good caring nursing home and I visit her 3 times a week (my sister and brother covering the other days of the week). The home is a mix of those with dementia and those with "behavioural" problems (some eccentric habits!). My mum seems to be the most lucid one there which can make her feel like she is in a mental institution but, overall, recognises that the place is good for her.
This transition to a home became necessary following a fall, where she contracted pneumonia. Remarkably for a 93 year old, she recovered but needs to walk with a zimmerframe. This made returning to her home highly problematic, e.g. would mean the bed having to come downstairs in the lounge with a commode in the room since there's a step down to the toilet in the conservatory. I had reached saturation point with caring (far too few breaks) so it would have meant a resident carer. Hence she is far better off in a home for variety and better caring facilities.
As for myself, it meant I could finally return back to my flat. I have been here almost a week and it is quite wonderful. I am a semi recluse so it's not as if I am suddenly living life in the fast lane! I love solitude and focusing on the garden and getting back into trying out recipes are the on-going hobbies. Since becoming a full time carer I got a laptop and am now addicted! Spend most of my time online, e.g. various forums and a good spiritual chat site. I am so happy to get my life back.
I have been a carer for my mother for 10 years. The first 8 years were part-time, the last 2 years where I moved in with her and cared for her full time, following her 2nd stroke and heart attack. She had a stroke and, although still mobile, had vascular dementia. (It angers me knowing that the reason she got a stroke in the first place was that they took her off viox too slowly. It is an American drug and they had to take it off the market in US due to its links to strokes).
She is now ensconced in a good caring nursing home and I visit her 3 times a week (my sister and brother covering the other days of the week). The home is a mix of those with dementia and those with "behavioural" problems (some eccentric habits!). My mum seems to be the most lucid one there which can make her feel like she is in a mental institution but, overall, recognises that the place is good for her.
This transition to a home became necessary following a fall, where she contracted pneumonia. Remarkably for a 93 year old, she recovered but needs to walk with a zimmerframe. This made returning to her home highly problematic, e.g. would mean the bed having to come downstairs in the lounge with a commode in the room since there's a step down to the toilet in the conservatory. I had reached saturation point with caring (far too few breaks) so it would have meant a resident carer. Hence she is far better off in a home for variety and better caring facilities.
As for myself, it meant I could finally return back to my flat. I have been here almost a week and it is quite wonderful. I am a semi recluse so it's not as if I am suddenly living life in the fast lane! I love solitude and focusing on the garden and getting back into trying out recipes are the on-going hobbies. Since becoming a full time carer I got a laptop and am now addicted! Spend most of my time online, e.g. various forums and a good spiritual chat site. I am so happy to get my life back.
