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speak up or say nothing - Carers UK Forum

speak up or say nothing

For anyone who is bereaved or no longer providing care.
not sure where to post this.
fil moved to wales didnt want to move with us o dear feel this may go on a bit.
as yet now word when move with hubbys work. now as far as we were told sil would be looking after him. so for they been on holiday in past 4 months about 4 weeks and few weekends, which i dont mined there choice. its who looking after fil that worrys me.
they said got carers in which he pays for but when called he says that he did washing himself,did his meals also cleaned up after himself when spilled his mug of tea. now he wasnt aloud to be on his own when he lived with us. he should not be cooking and cleaning for himself he just not fit . is it a case of little white lies from fil or is it sil how can i find out if fil is ok and being looked after properly . should i interfer or stay well out of it as not my place as not looking after him . when we call him does say he misses getting meals cooked for him. dont get it as sil supposed to do that, they eat to late at night which is why on wff. sil not got social serves involved, not got anything arranged for fire, door or phone as hes deaf we had a system when he was here. i will admit bit scared for him. so what to do for best he does need a bit of tlc at his age. i will admit i dont think i could go through that again yes being selfish , on other hand wouldnt like to think poor old sod trying to cope on own as didnt want to upset anyone. any ideas. what and where to go from here?
It's not your dad, so I'd keep quiet. You really don't want him back do you? If there is a problem then it is now SIL's responsibility to sort it out, and your husband if his help is asked for. I seem to recall dad asked to go and live with her? If there is something really, really worrying then you could share your concerns with the social services where dad is now living.
thanks bowlingbun just needed to here that.