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Unbelievably poor care in Nursing home! - Carers UK Forum

Unbelievably poor care in Nursing home!

For anyone who is bereaved or no longer providing care.
My Mum, who I've cared for for 13 years, is now in a care home that is about 11 miles away from where we live. by car, but I don't drive so have to rely on public transport. Every day for the last 3 weeks I have taken the train to see Mum, often staying for 7 hours.

Mum can't have her head a less than a 30/35 degree angle to her body ergo, she can't lay flat on her back or on her side. If she does, she loses consciousness, and has short term memory problems and aphasia. This problem started about 13 years ago right after her stroke.

This problem, along with her incontinence, and inability to stand, requirement to be hoisted, and waking dreams due to her medication, were all stated in Mums care plan and assessment by the nursing home. However twice while I've been there they have ignored the note over her bed stating that she must be hoisted for everything, and ignoring mum and myself's instructions that she can't be laid flat. We've brought this and other problems; call bell being left out of reach, not water glass in reach etc to the nurse who assessed her, the nurses on duty on her floor, and yet the problems still occur, despite the nurses saying that everyone knows what should be happening. We've involved Mums Social Worker and 'Home finder' and we have a meeting tomorrow at the home.

We are trying to get her a placement closer to home, not just because it wil be easier to visit, but because Mum is now scared to be left in this home. Id like to say we're hoping to move her before the current home does permanent damage, but I fear, as she is still having memory problems from last weeks incident, this is too late. Oh and this Nursing home has a CQC rating of 2!

Please send us positive vibes, Mum needs all the help she can get.
Hi Jack41anto, sending you as many positive vibes as possible, hope it all turns out ok.
hi how did the meeting go. do fill us in and keep us updated on your mums situation.

thinking of you. x
Meeting seemed to go well, despite the nursing home not knowing about the meeting! the on duty nurse sat in on meeting and agreed to various things, including one of the carers on the floor being excluded from Mums care. Next day the nurse who assessed Mum called a meeting with myself and my brother (the social worker couldn't be bothered to attend) and we did settle some issues, and sort out the stirring and incorrect info the Social Worker had brought up eg. carer can't be excluded from Mums care. We are still having issues with them not managing to hoist Mum for everything, but the seem to be doing it most of the time. Worrying thing is that partly due to being stuck in her room due to fractured ankle, Mum is very isolated and therefore lonely. This is adding to her confusion and depression. Fingers crossed that she can make the fracture clinic in the new year and then be able to use her wheel chair. Social worker also suggested that it was me that wanted Mum to move to a home closer to where we've live for the last 40 + years, and not Mum, but Mum set her right on that point. I wonder if we could hire a companion to go sit and help Mum for a couple of hours a day. Just things like chatting with her, finding a TV show to watch, or playing games with her? Any ideas would be greatly appreciated. All the time the Nursing home says I need to back off, and all the time Mum is getting more depressed an thinking of giving up.
What sort of interests does your Mum have?My Dad would have welcomed anyone who could talk about life in the Merchant Navy, or any discussion about local history.
My Mum,when she was alive, loved to hear about local people,plus "The Archers" on the radio.
My next door neighbour has a "cleaner" who has become a friend,and they compare notes about modern supermarkets/oldfashioned grocery shops.
Does your Mum enjoy scents,as reflexology or aromatherapy massage might relax her.
You know your Mum much better than any nursing home. You have her best interests at heart,and you are doing a great job of it. Don't pay any attention when they tell you to back off.
I hope you find something that will help her.
Hi there. Not sure if it helps, but I know when Mum was alive I used to worry about her being on her own without anyone to talk to and spent quite a bit of time looking around for someone to perhaps pop in to chat. Unfortunately, Mum wasn't very sociable and didn't want anyone despite complaining about not speaking to a soul! Anyway, you could try Crossroads and the Royal British Legion will also step in if there was any link with the services (however small). I realise that perhaps you haven't got on 100% with social services but it may be worth asking one of their departments for any suggestions or even the council.

Good luck, I hope you find someone as I know it could really make such a difference.