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Losing my daughter - Carers UK Forum

Losing my daughter

For anyone who is bereaved or no longer providing care.
My daughter hannah was special needs and had epilepsy. She died 4 weeks ago today and its just so hard. We did everything together when she wasnt at school. Watch tele. Sit on the sofa. She had this little cheeky smile. And now its like im not needed. I have a 9 year old son but he goes off on his own in his room only see him for food. Hannah was my world and i just miss her so much.
that's really tough. so sorry x
Sending you some virtual hugs
That's really tough, but your son needs you too, because he's just lost his sister.
Now is the time to take him out, give him the attention that I suspect he's always wanted, but understood that your daughter's needs had to take priority.
My youngest was brain damaged at birth. When he moved into boarding school at 16, it was the first time in his life that No.1 had our undivided attention. No.1 is now 41, he's only recently started talking openly about how he knew there was no alternative, his brother had to come first.
So sorry Tracey.
Also sending you some hugs xxx
So sorry for the loss of Hannah,Tracey.(((Hugs to you and your son)))
Sending you hugs (((Tracey))) you must miss her so much.

Her school staff & pupils are missing her too. Are you having any support from school?

BB is right, your son is grieving too. He is more independent than your daughter was, but he does need you too. Perhaps you could take up a new hobby together.

Be sure to grieve together, to talk about your daughter too. Maybe go through photos, put some in a special book. He needs to know how to grieve, and to know life still goes on. I am a widow, so know something of how difficult this is.
How desperately sad for you all.

I know you are focussing on your grief for your poor daughter, and you feel your son is 'hiding away' but that is NOT because he 'feels nothing' ......it is a sign of his desperate need now for YOU.

PLEASE do not let him feel that you would have preferred his sister to have lived, and HE to have died. Children can take these things to heart - don't ever let him think he is not loved and cherished. Hug him tighter than ever now.....

He will be sad and frightened - he needs you desperately now.