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How life can change in a year - Page 2 - Carers UK Forum

How life can change in a year

For anyone who is bereaved or no longer providing care.
Hey Henrietta,

Date/no date - who cares - you are wise so just enjoy the attention. There may be a lovely guy - even ex carer out there - you can both look back and smile at us poor plonkers stuck here still! ;) xx

Anne - I was so reminded of Chris from the Gulag's words that have *always* stuck with me - "what goes in isn't what comes out" ..........................I know it takes a long time to realise the cage is open and after that, get over being 'institutionalised'

Jenny - still trying to keep my faith. Thank you!!!! One day I hope you and I will have a celebratory coffee together!
What goes in isn't what comes out.

I'm flattered ... Former Carers thread ... for stating the obvious ?

https://www.carersuk.org/forum/support- ... pect-31598

For many former carers , part of who they were was lost during those caring years and ... at the same time , part of what they are now was gained during those same years ?

Be wary of just what has been let loose ... after being caged for so long ?

The word ANACHRONISM springs to mind ... sums me up to a tee ... and not a golfing one.
I feel like I am a bit of a tough old boot and as mentioned in another thread won't take any nonsense from anyone. All that lovey dovey stuff is so not me. The last thing I need is soneone worrying about me being out in the dark or not home on time etc etc- it would drive me doolally.
I know a lovely couple, the lady concerned was one of M's tutors at one service, her husband was keen on steam engines so we always catch up at one show each year. They live in their own houses, but get together regularly and are clearly very fond and caring of each other. I think this sort of relationship is very good for people who don't want to be alone all the time, but don't want to surrender everything either.
I tried internet dating a couple of times, one man was going to have to sell his house and buy a flat so he could afford an operation, couldn't look me in the eye at all, so that didn't go beyond the first coffee. The second was shorter than me, although I said I was only interested in someone 6ft plus, and all he talked about all evening was his mother's money!!
I would really like to have a man of my own age, in my life again, and I'm sure there must be a man I could get on with somewhere, but where?!

All I do now is try and sort out M's care.
Diane - I think we'll make that a bottle of fizz! You will SOOOOO deserve that. :)

B B - I think that kind of 'live out' relationship at 'our age' is a very good one. It retains mutual independence (and keeps finances separate - absolutely essential, especially if there are children) but gives one 'someone in one's life' etc etc. Space all round.

In a weird way, it's like being a twenty-something singleton again! (But without the slender figure and smooth skin, sigh, sigh )!sigh

BB - WAY UP is very sociable! (Though doubtless awash with widows rather than widowers - the latter can pick and choose!)