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caring for Ex-partner, kids, Tax credits fraud? - Carers UK Forum

caring for Ex-partner, kids, Tax credits fraud?

All about money
Hello,

Long story is my now ex-partner is being accused of benefit fraud. Background is last year she was sectioned under S2 and S3 for approx 4 months, and then on meds. I had to return to the amily home for sake of kids and have also been helping my ex to recover.

I am a DWP appointee and get her PIP and ESA set up, the money goes into her bank account.

I took control of financial issues re bills, etc direct debits coming out from my bank account and then she woud pay me after every 3 months. As she does not go outside I have to do the shopping for the kids and her using her card by her permission of course and do my shopping seperatly onmy card.

Due to her illness Children Social services at one point wanted to remove the children from her but they only allowed them to stay as long as myself or another suitable person would be present.

So I sleep on the spare bed/sofa, look after the kids, and also have ended up becoming her carer making sure she takes meds etc, we are NOT a couple any longer, but have developed an emotionless relationship, kind of clinical at times. It's a shame our kids have to go through this but I try to give them some sense of normality. We dont do anything as a couple for past 6 years, and she hasn't left the house in the past year.

She has been claiming Child tax credits as an induvidual but she got a letter today saying that they have information that she shouldn't be claiming this and should be claiming as a couple. They have asked for her bank accounts, legalpapers etc...

I stay approx 3-4 evenings a week to do the cleaning , loking after kids, cooking etc, getting kids bathed, washing etc and depending on how she feels sometimes have stayed for a week.

I have informed council tax people of the situation but how do i explain this to DWP again, has anyone been in a similar situation. The last thing she needs is another trigger that will start off another episode as it will definatly affect the kids alot more if she ends up getting sectioned again. What do i do from here, I amthinking of leaving and taking custody of the kids but then again think twice as it may cause them and my ex more harm than good.

Where do I go from here?

Hope someone can help, thanks in advance.
Hi Nasxtra,

Well first of all well done for stepping into what sounds like a very difficult situation to make sure your kids are well looked after. Must be very tough for you.

I'd make an appointment with the CAB for some advice but generally as long as you're honest and can back up everything you're saying these things do get sorted fairly quickly. If they were already certain there was something fraudulent going on they'd have stopped the claim and started an investigation. Asking for info is fairly routine and standard (although scary) so try not to worry too much about it.

If you write to explain the full situation, include all the info they request plus proof that your 'proper' home is somewhere else (rent agreement, mortgage papers, utility bill etc) and if you can get letters from the social worker, perhaps, and anyone who sees your ex re her mental health, like a support worker or doctor, and/or a letter from the hospital regarding her admission, all of that will show the situation is as stated. I've been investigated a couple of times after someone has 'received information' that i'm doing something I shouldn't be but because I wasn't doing anything untoward it was all sorted out relatively quickly. But in your situation I would still go along to the CAB to get some advice as well, just in case they have some more suggestions for resolving the situation quickly. Good luck.
This sounds very similar to what I am considering.

Becoming full time carer for my ex wife because of her mental health deteriorating.

Moving in with her and our daughter but into the spare room.

Are they basically trying to say you are her partner and not her carer ? How do you prove otherwise ? Quite worried now.
It's a complicated arrangement that has accidentally happened.
We had problems and ended up seperating under domestic violence allegations, this is before she had actually been diagnosed with mental health problems. She had custody of kids but she let me visit them. I lived at my parents house, when she got sectioned children social services wanted to take them into care unless I looked after them until mum got better, so school etc had to be taken into account, over past 12 months I have ended up full time carer for mum and kids because if I am not present she is not fit enough to look after them and they will be taken into care.

Anyway I have booked an appointment at the CAB hopefully get this sorted somehow