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jenny lucas Online
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- Posts: 9648
- Joined: Mon Oct 07, 2013 5:39 pm
Tue Jan 05, 2016 11:40 pm
I think there's some 'subjectivity' that is also an indicator of 'objective' measures. You do get a feel for a place, both pro and anti, which is an indicator I think. Sometimes the 'feel' is not the fault of any of the staff, but simply the place itself.
For example, when my MIL had to move to a specialist dementia home, the one I thought would be the best wasn't in the end - not because the staff weren't dedicated and friendly, but the place was an old Victorian house, with a large modern annexe, and because it dealt with severe dementia cases to be honest the whole place I found intensely depressing, even in the social rooms in the older Victorian section.
I then saw another place that was set on a hill, lovely views, and purpose built like a long 'motel' in that the rooms were all aligned along a long corridor, and the south facing rooms all had lovely views, as did the large dining room and the residents lounge. I just instantly liked it better (and luckily they had a vacancy, so that is where MIL is).
Don't be afraid of trying your mum out in one place, but then moving her to another. I did this with MIL (she went into that first place first, but went to the second place a few weeks later).
Be cautious about signing the contract - I was fortunate in that I hadn't signed for the first home, and so she was able to move across to the second home without incurring a 'notice' period.
One downside of the second home is that it won't keep her if she lives long enough to have spent all her money from the sale of her flat, whereas the first one would have (so if she lasts as long as your mum, then alas, she may well end up back in that first home.....)
PS - your mum probably won't like any home you find.... (sigh). But then, would any of us actually prefer to end our days in a home, rather than in our own home???? (But, yet again, that's what can happen if one lives 'too long'......)(all so, so sad, sigh.)