We need your help on your experiences of stress

[Felicity Carers UK]

We need your help. We are developing new resources to help carers cope with the pressures of caring. We want your experiences and tips to be central as carers uk has always found that other carers, especially new carers value this kind of information.

Over next few days we will ask a series of questions. We will ask your permission before we use any personal statements. We are very keen to gain insight into complexities of coping with care and seek permission to contact you through private message. If you do not want to be contacted please start your message with 'No'.

STRESS
1. How do you know when you are stressed? How does it impact you?
2. Are there any ways in which your levels of stress impact on your loved one?
3. Are there particular times of the day that are more stressful for you?
4. What tips do you have to avoid, or how do you prevent becoming too stressed?
5. How do you personally overcome your stress, or what tips can you offer others to manage times of high stress?
6. What helps to keep you feeling positive?
7. What helps to keep you motivated on a day to day basis?

[Felicity Carers UK]

Hi Audrey,

Thanks for your feedback, you are right the post is not very clear and I have edited it now. The resources we want to create will be for the website and on some occasions we may contact you to ask further questions on a particular subject you have responded to. The idea is to create content that is created by carers for carers. The Bertie Bear thread you gave as an example is exactly the sort of thing we are looking for.

I hope this explains things more fully, thank you for taking the time to answer the questions,

Felicity

[susieq]

1. How do you know when you are stressed? How does it impact you?
When I get overtired; have a headache; get grumpy; just lose interest in everything or start shouting at the cat !

2. Are there any ways in which your levels of stress impact on your loved one?
She senses something is wrong and responds by being more awkward than usual !

3. Are there particular times of the day that are more stressful for you?
First thing in the morning when I wake and realise I have another day of caring ahead and from late afternoon till bedtime when she starts ‘sun-downing’

4. What tips do you have to avoid, or how do you prevent becoming too stressed?
Have yet another cigarette ! Or another bar of chocolate ! Make sure I get my full respite time away from home.

5. How do you personally overcome your stress, or what tips can you offer others to manage times of high stress?
Personally I’m finding it very difficult to manage my own levels of stress so wouldn’t presume to tell others how to manage theirs. But I’m told (on Scally’s excellent authority) that exercise is the best stress buster, but I can't endorse that as I never seem to be able to find the time to try it !

6. What helps to keep you feeling positive?
The thought that “this too will pass”

7. What helps to keep you motivated on a day to day basis?
The thought that “this too will pass”

[Scally]

This all assumes that I find caring stressful. I dont.
Actually I could probably do with a bit more stress in my life: as a semi-retired, physically fit, former manager, I miss the boardroom battles and often wish my local carers centre could put on some white-water rafting, bungee jumping or hang-gliding sessions, but all they seem to offer is Indian Head Massage. God they are dull!
By the way, I am perfectly serious.

[Sparklingtechie]

STRESS
1. How do you know when you are stressed? How does it impact you?

Because my energy drains and I just want to get into bed and hide from the world. I have stomach and intestinal ulcers
2. Are there any ways in which your levels of stress impact on your loved one?
Yes, as they are children it does affect them on the rare occasions I fail to gaurd against showing them the stress
3. Are there particular times of the day that are more stressful for you?
Afternoons mostly
4. What tips do you have to avoid, or how do you prevent becoming too stressed?
When the kids are not here I go and lie down and listen to my music via my phone/ go training/do my art
5. How do you personally overcome your stress, or what tips can you offer others to manage times of high stress?
The first part of this question is the same as Q4. Tips...I have none.
6. What helps to keep you feeling positive?
I don't think I have ever felt positive (how do you feel a noun?)...do you mean in a good mood? if so, dunno
7. What helps to keep you motivated on a day to day basis?
The fact I have to be up and would trust the social services getting their grubby little hands on my kids if I upped and died...so...stubborness.

[Booksey]

1. How do you know when you are stressed? How does it impact you?
I get headaches, increase of IBS problems, lack of energy and cross very cross with everyone
2. Are there any ways in which your levels of stress impact on your loved one?
It makes him feel guilty
3. Are there particular times of the day that are more stressful for you?
all of it
4. What tips do you have to avoid, or how do you prevent becoming too stressed?
Breathe, count to 10, walk the dog and come on the forum and talk to others in the same boat
5. How do you personally overcome your stress, or what tips can you offer others to manage times of high stress?
See 4 also just started to get respite sits and massage
6. What helps to keep you feeling positive?
That today might be a good day
7. What helps to keep you motivated on a day to day basis?
If I don't do it who will

[barrowgirl]

Too stressed and tired to read all the q's right now.But like Sparklingtechie says - I want to get into bed and hide,and sleep and sleep and sleep.And my health suffers- migraines,no energy,skin break outs,comfort eating.
good luck with your research
B.x

[Lazydaisy]

STRESS
1. How do you know when you are stressed? How does it impact you?
I am badtempered and my husband certainly recognise4s it, even if I don't!
2. Are there any ways in which your levels of stress impact on your loved one?
Yes, as above.
3. Are there particular times of the day that are more stressful for you?
night time.
4. What tips do you have to avoid, or how do you prevent becoming too stressed?
There aren't any. Diabetes does not take a day off and low or high blood sugars can happen at any time and need dealing with(bearing in mind that my younger son died due to problems with his diabetes).
5. How do you personally overcome your stress, or what tips can you offer others to manage times of high stress?
Walk, alone if I can. I have to have time to myself, to try to come to terms with the changes in my life. I have to keep my mobile phone on, in case of a caring emergency which has happened plenty of times, but I always hope for a peaceful walk.
6. What helps to keep you feeling positive?
My two living children, both adult now,and my toddler grandson, with all the magic that a baby shares with the world.
7. What helps to keep you motivated on a day to day basis?
as above, my two children and my grandson.

PS I would love the chance of Indian head Massage, I have had it done in the past, and it was so relaxing.I also love reflexology.


Top

[daylily]

Hi, 4.30am cannot sleep so will do survey....

1..How do you know when you are stressed? How does it impact on you?
I get tense/jumpy and cannot think straight. Do stupid things like put the butter in the cupboard and the cups in the fridge
2..Are there ways in which your stress levels impact on your loved one?
Less patience with him and he looks at me as if I'm about to implode.
3..Are there particular times that are more stressful to you?
Mornings. Take pills for arthritis and need an hour for them to work and it's 'What time is it?' 'What are we doing today?' 'What day is it?' 'have i had my breakfast yet?' Grrrrrrrrr
4..What tips do you have to avoid or prevent getting stressed?
None I'm afraid
5..How do you personally overcome stress ? What tips for others to overcome stress?
Go in the greenhouse/garden or wash the windows outside. Sorry no tips for anyone, everyone's different.
6..What helps keep you positive?
Nothing really helps
7..What helps to keep you motivated on a day to day basis?
Putting myself in hubby's shoes

[NanaNana]

1. Can't think, get lethargic, can't be bothered with anything, lose interest, snap at the thought or mention of yet another job for me that needs doing. Don't sleep, don't eat, start drinking.

2. Start shouting and losing patience. Get resentful cos caree can't 'do' a thing or give me a hug.

3. When we have bad PA's, then it's throughout the day, anytime.

4. Walk away from situation. Go out and get away. Walk down the road.

5. as no. 4 or launch into a load of frantic housework. No real tips to overcome it.

6. Don't keep positive really, but thoughts of grandson's antics and words, make me feel better.

7. Doesn't make me motivated, but if I don't do everything, nobody else does it and the situation becomes worse - nobody else will mow the grass or unblock the drain pipes or do the gardening or do car maintenance or clean the gutters or the fishtanks etc etc.