We need your help on your experiences of sleep

[alfred turner]

when i am at moms that is most of the time i have to get what slee i can on the sofa when i can i would guess i get between 3 and 4 hours a night

i tend to drop off when i can when she sleeps unless i am dealing with problems and or house work
i use no sleep aids as i need to be able to wake fast if needed

i find that this leads to me being like a bare with a sore head far too oftern and keeing that under controll whendealing with the so called profesionals can be a strain


dealing with mom i can normaly stay calm

i dont have much in the way of calling out so to speak just honest requests for a drink etc so that is never a problem

like has been said night time crisis is an auto piolot time as infact is a day time crisis

my only tip would be get what sleep you can when you can and if you are getting too stressed to cope then get out for a few mins (if you can get cover or your loved one is safe to leave)

[Lazydaisy]

we have recently bought a memory foam mattress and bed to go with it, we bought an expensive one,affordable because it was coming off the shop floor;they were selling it half price.
It has made such a difference. I still don't sleep well, but that is because of my thoughts going round and round, but at least I can be sorry for myself in comfort!I am not waking up with pain in my elbows and knees any more, neither my husband or I move much now at night,and yes it is very warm.I haven''t been uncomfortably warm at all.I usually use an electric blanket in the winter, but I don't think I will need one this year.
Only trouble is, my son had a lie on it and he wants one now, too!

[Brindleboy123]

Memory foam....as many have said, very comfortable but we have had endless problems. The bed is extremely hot and I don't think we would ever want to use the electric blanket again. Our bed has space underneath for storage and everything started to smell musty. When we took everything out we discovered mould! Managed to get rid of it with household vinegar but nowadays we always leave the bed lifted up for half an hour or so when we get up for it to air. I have 4 humidifiers under the bed and have to change these ever 2 - 3 weeks! I guess it is quite possible that it is simply too hot here for memory foam mattresses. Another mistake we have made is to buy memory foam pillows at the same time....big mistake - I ended up waking every hour just to turn the pillow because it was so hot!

If you can cope with the heat (and Scally Im sure you would where you live), then the memory foam are definately very comfortable.

Bell

[Jimbo]

Jan uses a V-PAP machine, the mask usually very noisy because it tends to leak air, from around the face seal. If Jan tightens it too much it causes 'Mask face' which is an imprint of the mask which can last several hours, and an abrasion on the bridge of her nose.

I have resorted to using ear plugs two (one fome and one gel) in each ear! I can still hear if Jan calls out in the night, but the noise from the mask is reduced so that I can get to sleep. The problem is if I wake up in the night to go to the loo, I can hear it even with the ear plugs in and have a job getting back to sleep again, this can tack about 45 minuets. Jan has a new mask, which she is 'trialling', so far it's very good for me but it's leaking and noise is giving her bad nights.

[Eun]

Jimbo has Jan tried nasal pillows instead of a full face mask? This is what Rob uses with his Bi-Pap machine. When he used to use a facemask he was in a terrible mess with it - his skin was breaking down (he uses his ventilator at least 14 hours a day). With the nasal pillows he finds he gets yellow headed spots below his nose but I think that's partly the silicon and partly his age.

Eun

[Guest]

Got a memory foam bed, absolute heaven!

[Sassy]

1. What strategies can you share for others to help manage:
• giving overnight medications

Not applicable in our case - Caree's only on pain meds and once he's asleep, I figured that the best solution is to leave him to sleep until he wakes of his own accord.

• caring for your unsettled loved one overnight

This can be an interesting situation because my caree is of the type to get up once he wakes so if he wakes at 4am, he gets up and stays up until he nods off on the sofa - despite my constant assurances that laying in bed won't do him any harm. The simple version is to leave him to do as he pleases but be alert for any emergencies occuring.

• having to turn your loved one overnight

He can turn himself now he has grab rails fitted.

• coping with overnight crisis

This is a whole set of problems on it's own!!!

• coping with calling out throughout the night

Calling out isn't largely an issue - He only calls if he needs something or something has happened. A bigger issue is withdrawal from his meds if he's let his prescription expire.

2. What do you find the most challenging about sleeping well and getting enough sleep?

Actually getting to sleep in the first place. For a long time, I'd adapted to sleeping in the daytime for reasons I'm not going to go into here. I'd gotten too far into this rut that I can still be wide awake at night, yet shattered all day.

3. What strategies/approaches do you use to help you get to sleep?

Now, I know I'm going to get told off for this one but I stay up until I'm physically exhausted - then I go to bed, usually I'm out with the light. If I go past tired I stay up until it comes again or I start to feel like I'm drunk, then I'll go to bed.

[Guest]

SLEEP
1. What strategies can you share for others to help manage:
• giving overnight medications
• caring for your unsettled loved one overnight
• having to turn your loved one overnight
• coping with overnight crisis
• coping with calling out throughout the night

2. What do you find the most challenging about sleeping well and getting enough sleep?
3. What strategies/approaches do you use to help you get to sleep?

Hi Felicity Carers UK

1, N/A to overnight medication.
Caring for my son overnight depends on the situation. On a normal night he won't sleep in a room on his own. He shares a room with his brother. On restless nights in order not to keep his brother awake both my son and I will 'sleep' downstairs on the sofas ( 6mths ago he decided he was to big to sleep in my bed) He was at the time 11 years old. If he had wet himself then a quick shower and on the sofa while i see to his bed sheets. If it was a 'nightmare' then on the sofa while i cuddle him with his blanket over his head. This has been his coping trick when stressed out. Want ever the situation I do as little talking as possible. I engage on the minimum terms. Even when he has a nightmare because half the time he doesn't remember. The message is this is night time and not social time.

N/A to turning over in the night time but I do get him up for the toilet sometime if he hasn't managed to go before bed. Again minimum talking if any.
Coping with over night crisis I try and do with minimum talking. I know I keep repeating this but the less I talk and just deal with the crisis the quicker my son goes back to sleep. For bed wetting have sheets , towel and pjs handy. Having spare set on bedding ready eg pillows with pillow cases etc. These are downstairs by the sofa now. This will help not to disturb my other son who has to share a bedroom.
Calling out for no reason I ignore but if it persists then I remove my son to the sofa downstairs so not to wake everyone else up. This is very rare though as he usually comes and prise my eyelids open literally .
2/3, I find it challenging to mentally think the next day. I don't retain information. I go on auto pilot. I lose weight when I am stressed but I eat more when I am tried and it is all the rubbish food as well and this is in the night when I should go back to sleep. I sit after the 'incident' with a cup of tea and a snack. I don't know why because I am not hungry just tired . So now I try to go to the gym for the weight ! but I also do a puzzle from my puzzle book. This helps me not thinking I am tried or snacking. I normally sleep 4 hours a night, 2 or less on a bad night . 5 hours is a lie in. If we have had a bad period and I am getting on average 2 or less then when things settle I have to retrain myself to sleep longer periods again . I don't know where I read it but if I wake after 2 hours I try not to stir but mentally relax each muscle from the feet up . I don't get very far and fall back to sleep . Hope this helps

Clarabell