[phpBB Debug] PHP Warning: in file [ROOT]/phpbb/session.php on line 585: sizeof(): Parameter must be an array or an object that implements Countable
[phpBB Debug] PHP Warning: in file [ROOT]/phpbb/session.php on line 641: sizeof(): Parameter must be an array or an object that implements Countable
upset by family - Page 3 - Carers UK Forum

upset by family

Share information, support and advice on all aspects of caring.
Eun, that probably works very well for Rob who is young and has no memory problems - unfortunately it wont work for someone who is elderly and forgetful. I mean - you are right that no-one has to be a carer, but its no use saying it to her as she probably thinks she can do everything perfectly well by herself (mum was certain that she was doing all her housework, washing and shopping when in reality she was doing none of it) and probably wont remember what was said anyway! :roll: :roll:
I had a word with mum's GP today and she agreed that it seems that mum has dementia. She has all the signs bar one. GP will check that it's not an acute medical condition and then refer to a memory clinic. I can scream and shout but my mum doesn't understand and then forgets. I can leave her but then she will have to go into a nursing home and she's a holocaust survivor who looked after a husband who never got over his loss in the war, and a disabled daughter. I've made the decision to do what I can for as long as I can. I've found this forum very helpful and it has stopped the guilt and the damage caused by the 'helicopters'. With support, I can try keep her at home, and learn how to keep her safe. And those helicopters won't get away with more nonsense. Knowledge is power.

Is there a 'caring for people with dementia for dummies'?
The more help you get, the longer you can care. Asking for more help isn't an admission of failure, on the contrary it's a way of saying that you will do whatever you can, but someone else needs to step in to give you a break at times. Try to think hard about time management. Garden needs doing? Get a gardener, do away with the borders, get some black weed suppressant material and cover any former veg patch etc. See if the Scouts want to earn some money by helping (for a badge). Put away ornaments, don't wear clothes that need ironing, get a washer dryer (dirty clothes in, clean dry clothes out), get a dishwasher. Just anything that you can avoid. Internet shopping saves ages.
EllenG wrote:Is there a 'caring for people with dementia for dummies'?
Yes there is
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Dementia-For-Du ... 111892469X
Also check out the dementia section on here.
:)