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Trying to keep caree positive - Carers UK Forum

Trying to keep caree positive

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I'm sure others of you out there are encountering the same problems i'm having with Sarah at the moment.

She seems to be losing interest in things and much prefers to spend her days either in bed or on the sofa watching TV. I can handle that every now and then I like to pig out and do nothing but my concern is that Sarah's doing it most days and I literally have to force her to come out with me.

I completely understand there are times when she doesnt want to go out and am more than happy to ensure that she's comfortable on when she wants to stay at home but I think she'd feel a bit better if she went out a little bit more but it's difficult to suggest what to do with her. I'm booking her at a dance lesson in a few weeks but it's only a lesson for a few hours, I'm trying to talk her into doing an evening class but I dont want to seem like I'm forcing her to do something.

Are there any others who are encountering the same problems i've just described and what ways have you overcome them without damaging the relationship with your caree.

Its the other way round with me Image it`s the old doll who wants to get up and go and poor old me who wants to sit round the house doing nowt Image

Sorry to here this Alex. I have an awful job to get Jill out most days, but when she's out she's a differant person. Its very easy to get in a rut so just keep encouraging but not forcing her to come out with you. Maybe its the time of year? Dull cold days, makes us want to hibernate.

All the best

Hi Alex

sorry to hear that Sarah doesn't feel like going out - what about inviting a gang of friends over for something ? Maybe a Trivial Pursuits contest at home ? I find that Mum wants the company but not the pfaff of going out - she's a different person when she's got visitors. And like Pete says maybe it's got something to do with the weather.

Have you thought about just going for a drive, to see a bit of scenery that sarah enjoys, with perhaps a pub or cafe at the end of the journey?Or even a picnic with a flask and sandwiches.

My husband has times like this, and it can be frustrating, but there are times when I feel as though I just can't face the world any more, and he ends up persuading me, so it is a two way thing with us. (Don't know what we would do if we both felt sorry for ourselves at the same time. )

Best of luck.
If she can't face going out people round is a great idea, 'cos sometimes it is the hassle of going out that is the real problem.
hi alex

sorry to hear that sarah is feeling like this, i think the others have
covered most of it, however people round, then maybe all go out
together for a while?

I know exactly what you are saying Alex I had to put up with similar for years other half would rather stay in bed than get up, her favourite saying was "in a minute" then if I made her get up she would spill drinks and find one excuse or another.
In the end it was turned to it was my fault she didn't get up and it was also my fault she didn't go out.
Crikey Smiler, sounds as if we've the same Mrs. Mine has said and done exactly the same things for years also. She once stayed in bed for five months!!! Image