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Some advice needed? - Page 12 - Carers UK Forum

Some advice needed?

Share information, support and advice on all aspects of caring.
162 posts
Not feeling to bad at the moment .. slight muzzy head but ImageEven the poor dogs are looking at me and running .. Image
First day of taking the tabs not too bad..lets see how they go in the next 2 weeks

Lots of snow here 3-4" here hate snow ,, Image

Mum had me wake most of the night asking for nebuiliser and that she hadn't had it and she was breathless, i was feeling sleepy at 10.30pm so went to bed and then from 1pm it was ask ask moan moan untill i gave her a nebuiliser to shut up around 4.30 after she fell a sleep and i was up around 5.30am.. I have a massive headache and feel like crap..

I was hopeing to get to milton keynes today just to get out, but i think the snow has put paid to that .. Image .. i will see what my frind says later on ..
Here's some pics of the snow outside my flat this morning at 7am..

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Got to milton keynes .. the main roads where clear .. did abit of window shopping and then went to GBK for a burger .. really nice cheese and bacon burger yummy thats my treat for the week..

Here's a voucher to print off you can get 2 for £10 untill the 26th Feb

http://assets.gcstatic.com/u/apps/asset ... 220624.jpg

Mum has been on fine form non stop nagging .. this is wrong thats wrong, what time is this what time is that? .. ect ect ..
Mum is on fine form .. it's really really doing my head in since saturday morning .. Keeps on asking for nebuilser? .. whats the time?... How to long to the carers come?.. How long to nebuilser?..Have you rung the dr's yet??.. She keeps going on on .. Its every 5 mins AAAAARRRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!.. Its worse than a broken record stuck on repeat...

I have rung the dr's this morning mums chest is rattling again and she keeps on complaining of this pain in her chest?? .. just waiting for him to ring or visit..

These citralopram are giving me a muzzy head .. Image .. Still feel very tired had me up once last night at 2am to make a cuppa for her..

I Know this sounds horrible but i wish they would hurry up about her respite.. Quicker she goes the better i will start to feel hopefully...

Sorry for rant ... Image .. having a bad day .. Image
Hang in there and ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Sometimes knowing something you need is coming makes it harder to cope while you're waiting.
Hi there.

I'm not in your situation but very much recognise the signs of someone who is really on the edge, I got to that state of mind when I was looking after my daughter. My point of view might be at odds with some of the others but I can only say what I feel, no more or less.

I am very very glad you have got the respite coming up but I don't think it is going to be enough for you. I only had one weeks respite from my daughter in 21 years and although it was wonderful, I'm not really a believer in the "re-charging" of batteries as you are right back into the same routine after respite and nothing has changed. For respite to be effective it has to be regular, long enough so that you can have time to help yourself..counselling, something specific that you enjoy, something along those lines.

I am inclined to agree with Scally (although not with the sentiments that Flossie pulled him up about!), I think for you to continue like this is dangerous. Something has got to give and it will probably be you. Some of us are at our wits end and we somehow continue to carry out our caring role but for others it is just not possible to cope anymore..I think you are the latter Blue.
This is not a judgement on your abilities, just fact and you have nothing but admiration from me for how you have managed to cope with this situation until now but also for your honesty.

You have shared some very personal stuff with us, including the depth of your feelings towards your mother. She may be your mum but she is making your life hell, you are in danger of losing your grip completely, possibly losing your temper completely and you just can't carry on like this.

You're a brave man and a kind son because you are still there after all that has happened in your life. You have decided to start the process of ceasing to deal with the effects of your mothers dementia and I totally think you have done the right thing.

I am also on Citalopram (even though I'm a tough cookie!!) and it has been a massive help for me. I'm on 30mg, a dose titrated by myself with my GP's input and have been on them for about 8 months, primarily for very high anxiety levels and depression. I also used to get panic attacks. I think the key for anti-depressants is to use them not as a cure, but as a stepping stone to help you through a rough time. Too many people expect them to work miracles but they can only help if you are pro-active too. Writing on here is being pro-active, doing stuff to help your transition from carer to free person is helpful too. can I suggest that you also give the counselling a go? Maybe some time set aside for specific relaxation, maybe getting support from a local carers centre..there are lots of things you can do.

Don't be frightened off by the leaflet that comes with the meds, it can happen but it doesn't mean it WILL happen! 10mg is a very low dose, you may need something a little stronger and funnily enough I found it better to take mine in the evening so I didn't have the muzzy head.

This is just the start of you taking your life back and there is nothing wrong with that, nothing to feel guilty about.

Keep us posted Image
Thanks Ladybird & Mytrle .. Image

No news on respite today hopefully something tomorrow.. If not will ask the community matron and the ot who are coming wednesday .. i will get them to chase it ..

Going to have a early night feeling shattered, i hope mum gives me a peaceful night..
Just hold on, things are really moving in the right direction now.
Hopefully you will get some news soon.

Hope you have a peacefull night x
162 posts