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should I feel angry etc (part 2) - Carers UK Forum

should I feel angry etc (part 2)

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Last week I asked for advice about domicillary care for my son, thank you.
As suggested we agreed with care agency that they would provide support at his rented house on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday afternoon. Unfortunately my husband had an accident yesterday which meant we couldnt get our lad to the house.
I rang at 9.45 to let care agency know that he wouldnt need a service today, apologies etc. I went around to the property at 3ish this afternnon to borrow a garden chair to be met by service manager and his assistant enjoying a cup of tea in the garden. I was so shocked that they had apparently been in the house all day without my son being there that I couldnt think of anything to say. The service manager muttered something about doing some "constructive paperwork" and I shuffled out feeling a bit of a twit.
I can understand that we cancelled at late notice but Im at a loss as to why they were in the house.
We have never dealt with an agency before so perhaps its normal practice.
Hi Daisy,

That is definitely NOT normal practice and although the two you saw were probably just bunking off from work I would address it ASAP with whoever you dealt with to arrange the support for your son. If your son was not at home anyone from the agency should have left, not made themselves a cup of tea.

Looking at your earlier posts this seems rather a complex arrangement and I would expect the LA to give you support in the initial days to ensure that it works as it should along with ongoing support which you can call in when necessary either directly or via an organisation contracted to provide support to the users of IBs.

It is not clear from your previous post who actually rents the property on behalf of your son, you or the agency, but nevertheless the only valid reason for agency staff to be at the property would seem to be when they are providing support to your son or, with prior agreement from you, carrying out related tasks. As it is rented solely for use when your son is present I too would be concerned at the staff being there in your son's absence without your knowledge and without good reason, it would make me question whether they enter the property at other times without my knowledge.

In your position I would take my concerns to your son's care manager and also ask for more support in managing the IB at least in the initial stages and I would also consider being sole keyholder, giving the keys to the agency when your son was at the property or when they had tasks to do there.
Thank you for the replies.
The house is rented by the care company and we pay rent, utilities etc.
I am having a meeting with our sons care manager on Wednesday and discuss our concerns.
It is highly unusual and undesirable for the care company to effectively make your son their tenant. It makes it very difficult to get rid of them if you need to change care provider and it is a practice generally frowned upon.

What did your social worker say about that? If your son can't manage a tenancy there are other ways to deal with it so that he is the tenant in name, and these options should have been considered first.
It was the social worker who introduced us. It was a way of providing a day service and occasional respite. The company gave the appearance of having a wealth of experience of working with people with autism. So far they really havent come up to what we had expected and you are quite right, it will be impossible to get rid of them without also losing the property. The only good thing is that we have never been given a contract to sign.
I'd start asking the social worker why your son isn't the tenant in his own right (if necessary via deputyship or guardianship if he doesn't have mental capacity) so that he is protected if this agency turn out to be rubbish. Government guidelines are clear that housing providers and support agencies should be separate animals.

Speaking personally, the lack of a written contract is not such a good thing. Means they can make the rules up as they go along.
Pity they couldn't have got off their backsides and collected your son and taken him to the house for the afternoon....

This agency sound awful and rather suspect. I think you need advice, but I don't know from whom ....

I had a long meeting with social worker on Friday. She was angry about the service provider and gave me copies of our sons care plan and assessment. I hadnt been given a copy previously and now I have them I am angry with SS.
The assessment clearly states that my son needs 2-1 care at all times. Yet I remember when we were introduced by SS to the agency that they (ss)were quite happyto accept the 1-1 offerred by the company. We queried it at the time but didnt push things, mainly because its all that was on offer. The care plan just relates to this specific company and the costings they provided.
She actually laughed when I mentioned respite care, although its clearly mentioned on his assessment. She said it was impossible to find respite and service providers just slammed the door in her face.
So I now have to face a meeting with her and the service provider, just the thought is excrutiating for me, I cant stand confrontations.
So I now have to face a meeting with her and the service provider, just the thought is excrutiating for me, I cant stand confrontations.
Daisy - I can't comment on the whole sorry situation as I have no experience of anything like this but for your last comment I would offer the following advice -

Remember these are human beings just like yourself - they have to eat, sleep, breathe and sh*t the same as you - they are not super beings. I was once advised that when in a confrontational situation to imagine the other person sat on the loo with their pants around their ankles - I'm telling you it does put a whole new perspective on the relationship.

Also keep telling yourself that your viewpoint and comments are no less valid than theirs - you have every right to be angry over the way you have been treated. So just take a deep, deep breath and put your views over calmly and rationally - write them down beforehand and read them out if you don't trust yourself to remember all that you want to say.