Had such a bad day today that I considered leaving home - in fact I did for a while cos I sped off and had a good cry. Dad lives with me as he has dementia although not too badly but he hates my children. I'm sure they must get on his nerves sometimes but on the whole they are well behaved, thoughtful, considerate etc (not so much with each other!!!).
Dad was in a Nursing Home for a while but was very unhappy there, even though it was very nice, and had started to deteriorate much too quickly. My sister and I agreed that he would be much better off in a normal environment so he came to me (and has improved considerably). She wouldn't have him because he can be really difficult and nasty (that's before the dementia so you can imagine what he can be like now!) and she said her husband wouldn't have him in the house. She doesn't work and has a spare room with an en-suite. I'm a single mum of four and had to give up a good job to take care of him as well as turfing my daughter out of her bedroom and installing an extra shower room at my own expence. Unfortunately I am now financially dependant on him - I only claim child benefit and Carers Allowance and am using my rapidly depleting savings to pay the mortgage every month (that's why I can't claim means tested income support etc which is fair enough).
Anyway, this morning Dad tells me that he is going to live with my sister because my children are horrible. Mum loved all her grandchildren so much when she was alive and it breaks my heart that the one grandparent they have left wouldn't care less if they all dropped dead - and that's not the dementia , he's never had any time for them. I'm now in the positon of having given up a good job and being left with no income at a time when it won't be easy to get another one and certainly not at the pay I had before - I managed to get a temporary part time one at Christmas for minimum wage. Of course all this depends on whether she will actually have him but I just feel so upset that I've made so many sacrifices not just myself as it has all severly impacted on my children and our standard of living and he would think nothing of leaving us high and dry. They do say 'no good deed goes unpunished'.
Sorry for the long rant but I just feel so low right now and all I can do is cry. He would like to wave a magic wand and make my children dissapear and I would like to wave it and make me dissappear.
Dad was in a Nursing Home for a while but was very unhappy there, even though it was very nice, and had started to deteriorate much too quickly. My sister and I agreed that he would be much better off in a normal environment so he came to me (and has improved considerably). She wouldn't have him because he can be really difficult and nasty (that's before the dementia so you can imagine what he can be like now!) and she said her husband wouldn't have him in the house. She doesn't work and has a spare room with an en-suite. I'm a single mum of four and had to give up a good job to take care of him as well as turfing my daughter out of her bedroom and installing an extra shower room at my own expence. Unfortunately I am now financially dependant on him - I only claim child benefit and Carers Allowance and am using my rapidly depleting savings to pay the mortgage every month (that's why I can't claim means tested income support etc which is fair enough).
Anyway, this morning Dad tells me that he is going to live with my sister because my children are horrible. Mum loved all her grandchildren so much when she was alive and it breaks my heart that the one grandparent they have left wouldn't care less if they all dropped dead - and that's not the dementia , he's never had any time for them. I'm now in the positon of having given up a good job and being left with no income at a time when it won't be easy to get another one and certainly not at the pay I had before - I managed to get a temporary part time one at Christmas for minimum wage. Of course all this depends on whether she will actually have him but I just feel so upset that I've made so many sacrifices not just myself as it has all severly impacted on my children and our standard of living and he would think nothing of leaving us high and dry. They do say 'no good deed goes unpunished'.
Sorry for the long rant but I just feel so low right now and all I can do is cry. He would like to wave a magic wand and make my children dissapear and I would like to wave it and make me dissappear.