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Presents - Carers UK Forum

Presents

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I was wondering do the so called family send cards & presents throughout the year to the people u all care for?
When I was caring for Mum, she never received a birthday or christmas card from anyone other than myself and one or two "official" carers. My sister had fallen out with Mum and didn't visit or send cards. Very sad for Mum because of the grandchildren. Mum still sent out cards to the grandchildren but refused to send the money but kept it in a drawer. When she passed away there was birthday and christmas money for all three of my sister's children which she had no problem having.

Miss Daisey had birthday cards from friends when she was over here. She normally used to send out 50+ cards but the funny thing was, if someone didn't send one back they were off her list! Bless! She received a christmas present early last year as it came when she was in hospital. I was able to show it to her and she smiled. The friend that sent it was so pleased that her gift had got through before Miss Daisey passed away.

Bell
This is one of the stranger issues that we face because, although I struggle to get help from the family by way of day-to-day care, they are very good at sending presents and cards out - even if we do have to collect them from mum's.

My side of the family even call Dave son or brother (instead of in-law) after the carry on we've had with his side of the family, we've been forced to disown them.

As for the way that his side of the family are:- his sister would buy items second hand, keep them herself for a while then get bored of them and pass them on to me as a Christmas or birthday present while Dave would get brand new (and often expensive) gifts. Though if I was ill, they'd send me get well soon cards.
Hahaha No they don't. The outlaws - My OH's family have washed their hands of all of us including their grandchildren. They don't send him or the kids the time of day, let alone cards or gifts.
[quote]This is one of the stranger issues that we face because, although I struggle to get help from the family by way of day-to-day care, they are very good at sending presents and cards out - even if we do have to collect them from mum's.

My side of the family even call Dave son or brother (instead of in-law) after the carry on we've had with his side of the family, we've been forced to disown them.

As for the way that his side of the family are]

My sister left a xmas present for my mum, but posted the card which she did not get as her post goes to my house she doesn't know this, mums son went to mum's to collect present for his son from my mum & got no card or present for his mother. Yet he travelled in all that snow for a present & would not visit any other time so sad
Hahaha No they don't. The outlaws - My OH's family have washed their hands of all of us including their grandchildren. They don't send him or the kids the time of day, let alone cards or gifts.
That is awful I know how it feels
interesting one,this thread.just right for today too.well done.on and off they do sort of contact us.
No! Mum's had Christmas cards sent to her house, and they don't even know she's not there! I see red about it all and have to calm myself down and tell myself it doesn't matter - us who really love her through thick and thin are with her.
I gave up on cards years ago, so now we get very few.

As to presents, what gets me is my husband's (my caree) two grown daughters. He has been very generous to them. When I was working we were very, very generous at birthdays and Christmas. After I was made redundant two years ago my husband stopped giving them birthday gifts. This year he's in two minds about giving them Christmas gifts (it's always money). The two of them claim poverty, but they both manage holidays and expensive mobiles. I'm sure they'll get some dosh ... with my proddding ...

What gets me though is all they ever give their father is a cheap bottle of whiskey. They know they will be getting money many times over the cost. Sometimes, it is the thought that counts .. and IMO they are not doing a lot of thinking beyond themselves.