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Palliative care at home advice needed please - Carers UK Forum

Palliative care at home advice needed please

Share information, support and advice on all aspects of caring.
Hi everyone, I’m new here and glad I’ve found you.

Hoping some of you may be able to advise on this. I’ll provide a trigger warning for mental health and suicide in case this is needed for anyone and continue below.
So, I’m here as a carer for my Dad. He’s only 63 but has had a pretty rough life battling various health conditions since childhood. The last couple of years have been particularly rough and Dad’s now at a point where he feels he has no quality of life and doesn’t wish to continue to live.
Having been with him through everything, I fully understand and respect this wish. He made a serious attempt to take his life last year which was interrupted by health services as he had discharged himself from hospital.
I highly suspect he will do this again but should this be the case, I would rather it was planned as far as is ethically and legally possible.
Dad has today completed an Advance Decision to refuse any further admittance to hospital, or life saving or sustaining treatment outside of hospital. I have registered this with the GP and between us we have informed his close friends and neighbours. I have requested that the GP call me when he’s available; he too knows Dad well and would respect his views, but don’t think he’s in until the middle of Jan.
My concern is that either way, whether Dad takes his own life or gradually declines through infection, I want his suffering to be minimal.
I am fully aware that I cannot intervene or assist in any attempt on his life as is he. My question is what I would do in either situation given that calling an ambulance would be pointless as he’s refused treatment and to be taken to hospital. Would it therefore be a call to the GP and what happens then?
I’m an only child with a young family of my own, and whilst I can take time off work to be with him, I couldn’t be there 24/7 especially as I know through caring for grandparents (in very different circumstances, and who passed away in hospital) that death took some time and can be unpredictable. Would the NHS send a GP or nurse out to us? Or are there agencies we can use privately to help?
So sorry for the morbidity but honestly don’t know where to start xx
Hi Kathryn,
I’m not sure what you are asking.
Are you asking who to call/ what to do if your Dad does something to end his life? Or are you asking who to call/ provide support if he gets another infection, (that he doesn’t want treatment for,) but may accept palliative care until he passes?

Hi Melly, I was asking both questions. However, since posting, I’ve heard from the GP that he’ll be calling both Dad and I on Friday. Dad seems a bit perkier today too so hopefully we’ll get a proper plan sorted 😊
HI Kathryn,

Good that your Dad is feeling brighter and the GP is going to be in touch this week.