Nhs Continuing Care

[no1mum]

Most staff are off now for the festive break DitR. I will flag this up for them to respond on their return.

[Dancedintherain]

Thqnks. And they left us a very odd Christmas gift didn't they?

[Dancedintherain]

I'm still up too June, stewing after a conversation with a social worker determined to ignore all the rules to get mum out of hospital asap. I don't think they have a clue about how damaging all the aggravation can be.

It might reduce your stress a little to remember that your mother will need to be somewhere at some point. You have told us that the hospital have been ready to discharge her for months but you have been fighting the assessment for NHS CC. You have also said that she does not reach the criteria for it.
And now apparently she has started to suffer from hospital aquired infections. She is going to be safer in her own home or a care home and she really does need to know this is progressing rather than living in limbo land.
Mothers social worker does have her best interest at heart you know, it is her job.

You will be able to carry on pursuing your "case" wherever your mother resides and if that happens to be a nursing home, the managers are quite knowledgeable and she will be subject to regular reviews anyway, in case her needs escalate. I have tried to explain this before in the thread called simply NHS continuing care.

[Dancedintherain]

BTW I am aware I am not popular on this forum and that's OK. But I genuinely try to help where I can and whether anyone believes this or not is none of my business.

[Dancedintherain]

My last two posts appear to be too serious for roll call.... But as NHS CC is cropping up all over the place on various threads it is difficult to keep track. I am doing the best I can.


And .... I have a triple size sausage casserole in the oven is that good? Only one of me to eat it!! And I am currently devouring the tin of celebrations.
Which isn't actually a tin.
They are cardboard now aren't they?

[bowlingbun]

DIR, I've spared the forum a lot of detail about mum's problems in hospital. Suffice it to say that had she not been in hospital already, then she would have been readmitted anyhow, as they were potentially life threatening, not infection related. There is no evidence at all that the social worker has mum's best interests at heart. Had I spoken to anyone in the way that he spoke to me, when I was working, I would have had a severe reprimand. My son with SLD has been home for a fortnight, no one cares that I'm on my knees with exhaustion just dealing with him. Then there's mum, in hospital. Then I have her house to look after on top of everything else. She won't agree to anything that would make my life easier, like grassing over some flower borders at her house. Now she's talking about coming home again, which will inevitably end in yet another disaster. I also run a business which I need to survive, financially. My workload is currently impossible, mum is the greatest work creation scheme of all. I am increasingly concerned about both my physical and mental health. I simply can't carry on as I am any more.

[Duncaring]

Hi Bowlingbun
I know exactly what you are going through. I had it all with my dad. From October 2010 they mentioned Nursing Home (NB Nursing not care Home) but then they sent him home even after bringing him home for a trial morning and two OT seeing that I could not even shift the wheelchair. There were many more in stays in hospital, tons of out patient appointments which involved two man non emergency ambulance pick ups and drop offs. There were more failed discharges. In August 2011 I put it in writing to the Health Board that I could not go on after nearly 20 years of caring. There were another two discharges after hospital stays. There was an attempt to discharge 3 weeks prior to death when I demanded to see the Consultant and took my daughter in to the appointment in uniform on the pretext that she was going to work and despite the Consultant stating that there were no plans to discharge and it was she who would make that decision the nurses on the ward continued to be obnoxious to the family. January 2012 my dad died and by May 2012 I was diagnosed with two "rest of my life" conditions to add to the other four permanent conditions and the stroke at the age of 52 years. I really wonder if it was the caring or the dealing with a load of so called professionals being totally obstructive that ruined my health.
Now after the death the helicopter is demanding money. She did not show face in 15 years not even to go to my granny's funeral or my mum's funeral but she thinks she is due something. She is certainly due something but it is not money! Lucky for her I am not fit enough. Incidentally she works in a hospital !!

Dancing in the Rain
I have no idea whether you are a nurse or a social worker or a doctor or an admin in a hospital. I can only speak as I found. Nurses were as thick as two short planks with their discharges and statements about carers will be going in. Aparently carers can run a whole house in 1 hour a day. Social Workers were no less lacking in brain power. I have a letter stating that there was nothing wrong with my father dated 2 weeks before his second heart surgery and this was 35 years after my dad was retired on medical grounds! But Social Workers are sure that they know everything better than anyone else. Now I am terrified of my disabilties (confirmed by DWP) forcing me to be involved with all these difficulties again. I wont be less friendly towards you than anyone else but there are carers living very difficult lives because they dont get the support they need and deserve. Perhaps you have inside knowedge of how to get all the help needed.
Duncaring

[Dancedintherain]

OK. I do hear where you are coming from, honestly I do. I will try to reply to help you both understand. Yes I am a carer,well apparently I am, according to Carers Uk etc.though no longer full time. Call me a former carer if you wish.
I am certainly not a medic a social worker nor an administrator.

Though for the last couple of years I do not, in all honesty, totally consider myself a carer as such, this is ONLY because my husband now lives in a dementia unit and whilst I spend hours with him every day (apart from three in this period) I find this arrangement so COMPARATIVELY easy, in a PRACTICAL sense only, compared to my previous full time 24/7 caring role. That full time role crept on on us gradually until 1995 when I could no longer manage full time work as well as 'care' which is when I started with the 24/7 stuff.

I tell you all that not to "compete" ..... "Competition" would be pointless and unhealthy for this site. And I am fortunate in that I am very healthy, physically, though admit I have been down and stressed seriously at various episodes in my caring life.

On reflection, and THIS is most pertinent, at the times when I now realise I sometimes stressed over the WRONG things, I wish someone externally had been able to point out facts to me and made me re-think some of my own skewed thinking. I would have recovered quicker and only fought the battles which I had a chance of winning. Am I making myself clear I wonder? I hope so.

My caree has been and still is funded by NHS continuing care which BowlingBun has been wrecking herself with in trying to obtain it for her mother. She has my every sympathy. but obviously, she struggles to believe this, as it seems you do too. I can't do more about that.

As I see it, I strongly suspect that BB has been misled over the criteria used for NHS CC and I have, and still am, doing my best to present information on The CC subject. BB's poor mother is now apparently recovering from pneumonia, an infection acquired during her long stay in hospital. I have made my advice clear. If it is unwelcome, so be it.

I too have experienced my caree (my husband) acquiring infections in hospital whilst being treated for other matters. I too have dealt with failed discharges. My experience is why I want to help anyone in a similar position to what I have faced in the past.

There is often misunderstanding about the difference between failed discharges (which certainly happen, sadly) and bed blocking for other reasons.

I see you have had a dreadfully difficult time and your health is wrecked and I find it very sad. I feel for so many of the stories we can read on this forum. Where I can, I offer help. If
Anything I try to do to help is not relevant or if it irritates apparently you can use the Foe button and my posts won't be visible. My general aim is to defuse and de-stress, as I am aware that stress causes ill health and most of us, at different times, need support. And support comes in different packages.

Don't forget the foe button facility. I might even win an award for the most foes on the forum. Weak joke.

[Duncaring]

Hi Dancing in the Rain

I do not have anyone marked as "Foe" on here and I would not do that unless something very serious happened.
I have found dealing with people who just point blank DISCHARGE now matter what irritating. I have records of my dad being discharged with MRSA and LRTI while I have Asthma and Eczema. News Flash - clean those filthy hospitals and have the brains not to spread infections.
My kids are worried about me but not willing to be my carer after all that happened to me. I do not propose to pay for my care as I feel I paid a high enough price to land in this state. The animosity is created by those with power while those who do just get sh@t on. My cousin, a nurse, dumped their mother off in CC at the first stroke. When I had the stroke I had to carry on with a caree and a teenager still at school!
I also warned Social Work that my grandchildren were being abused but they refused to accept that so for the next 4 years I watch my family being battered by a violent drug fuelled idiot and eventually it came out that he nearly killed one of the kids.
I have not had good experiences and I can only speak to what I have seen
Duncaring

[Dancedintherain]

Duncaring, Of course we each speak from our own experience. And You have every right to be angry in your situation.
it's weak to say I hope things improve in your life ... But I do mean it.
We have probably trespassed too much on this thread now. I am sorry if I have aggravated you further, that was never my intention.