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New Carer - No Information - Page 2 - Carers UK Forum

New Carer - No Information

Share information, support and advice on all aspects of caring.
I think one added problem might be that for very many of us, we have had no previous experience of, or exposure to, Social Services. I didn't actually realise that SS were involved in the issue of Caring, because I guess I thought it simply all went through the NHS.

SS is quite alien to me, I don't know any thing about it, how it works, etc, etc, and have always been sufficiently fortunate (and I do mean that!) never to have needed SS in any way.

So I suppose I simply thought that when someone gets very old, then it's for the NHS to help, not SS.

I suspect too, that quite a few of the elderly are of the same mindset as me, and simply 'don't want' SS to have anything to do with them! (Because, er, SS are for 'poor people' and 'misfortunates' etc etc, not simply those who have got very old.....!!!)
Hi everyone, many thanks for your support and tips. I have just this week telephoned to enquire about our assessments, to be told that we are on their list and they will be in touch with us in due course but they couldn't give me any indication how much longer we would have to wait !! We have to go through Derbyshire City Council and they are so cash strapped it is unbelievable, saying that, they have just paid out thousands of pounds for a non-descript sculpture in the City Centre, but have closed a swimming pool because they can't afford to pay lifeguards!!

Thanks again everyone, I will just keep plodding on xx
Hi Val
I had to find out on my own too. Wish I'd found this forum at the beginning/ Click on the 'help and advice button ' and follow the links. Lots of information there.
I started by going on to my local authority website and finding out what they offered in the way of elderly care. That helped. Then, even though I realised Mum wouldn't be awarded full funding I called SS and arranged a 'Needs' assessment for her. (Hadn't thought of Carer's assessment' at first.). The needs assessment gave me access to the Occupational therapist and continence clinic. Both very helpful. Because Mum was mainly 'self funding' I chose my own Care company. A few hic-cups, but eventually had an excellent Care company whose staff were brilliant. On an 'as needs increased' basis I was in regular touch with SS, OT, CN and CC every day.

MUM is responsible for her care costs. If she hasn't the money then SS will take over. However they will take her pension and AA. If she is self funding she gets to keep both. YOU do not have to pay. Do consider direct payments and I do hope you have POA in place.
Hi Val, I'm in similar circumstances to you, although I was already living with my mum in an unpaid carers role due to mobility issues, and she has just recently been showing signs of dementia. I applied for the needs assessment over the weekend as we have to do it all online in my borough, and was told I'd get a call by Tuesday. No call on Tuesday so I called them to get fobbed off with, we are really busy, so someone will try and call within a week. I was meant to go back to work today but was up 3 times last night, as i've been most nights since Saturday directing my mum to where the toilet is, so I was exhausted this morning i didn't end up going. I called SS , had a meltdown and threatened to walk out and then they'd have to deal with my mum and lo and behold the assessment was done today . Don't be afraid to make a nuisance of yourself to get the help you and your mum need!
Hi and welcome, glad this forum is giving you lots of help too and wish you the very best in getting the support and help you and your Mum needs.
Hi Val,

I was in a similar situation to you and found out mostly by googling, including this Forum! Something else you may wish to ask for when you finally get your assessment is respite care. This would enable you and your husband to have some time to yourselves; also maybe there is day care support in place??

Also, please remember to let YOUR GP know that you are a carer. This may enable you to get flexibility in appointment times etc.

Finally, if your local authority is anything like mine, you will have to channel your oscar-winning performance of desperation. Unfortunately in these cash-strapped times, she who shouts loudest gets heard. I only got them to fund respite care when I was at the end of my tether and threatened to stop caring altogether.

Wishing you luck, and if you have any questions, one or other of us may be able to answer, anne x
At least elderly people get some kind of provision even though it might be patchy. Young disabled people like my son (aged 31) get bugger all provsion especially when it comes to palliative respite care...